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Feb. 12th, 2020 07:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
horrorbuff𝑴𝑶𝑽𝑰𝑬𝑺 𝑫𝑶𝑵'𝑻 𝑪𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑻𝑬 𝑷𝑺𝒀𝑪𝑯𝑶𝑺, 𝑴𝑶𝑽𝑰𝑬𝑺 𝑴𝑨𝑲𝑬 𝑷𝑺𝒀𝑪𝑯𝑶𝑺 𝑴𝑶𝑹𝑬 𝑪𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑽𝑬.
BETH: VIP TREATMENT. MUST BE NICE. TAKES THEM AN HOUR TO WAND MY FACE.
HAWKINS: YOU EVER THINK ABOUT, LIKE, NOT STICKING THAT CRAP IN IT, BETH?
BETH: WOULD YOU THINK I'M PRETTY THEN?
HAWKINS: TSK, I I DON'T KNOW. YOU STILL FREAKY AS HELL. I MEAN, BUT MAYBE WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT.
DEION: YOU WANNA CUT? I MEAN, IT'S COOL. YOU CAN TAKE MY SPOT.
BETH: TELLING ME TO CUT IS A BAD IDEA. LIKE, REALLY BAD.
BETH: IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
AMIR: UM NO. NONE OF THEM ARE, ACTUALLY.
BETH: SHOCKER.
AMIR: OKAY, SO THE BREAKFAST CLUB IS A COMEDY FROM A HUNDRED YEARS AGO ABOUT A GROUP OF WHITE KIDS FROM DIFFERENT CLIQUES WHO GET THROWN IN DETENTION TOGETHER. EIGHTY-NINE PERCENT ON ROTTEN TOMATOES.
BETH: IT'S BETTER THAN IT SOUNDS. MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE FILM.
AMIR: REALLY?
BETH: NO, DORK. I'M A HORROR GIRL. BUT FITCH IS RIGHT, THE SIX OF US PRETTY MUCH COVER THE ENTIRE NAUSEATING RANGE OF HIGH SCHOOL STEREOTYPES.
AMIR: IT SAYS THERE'S ONLY FIVE CHARACTERS IN THE MOVIE. SIX WORKS. IT'S BETTER, ACTUALLY.
MANNY: LET ME GUESS. NO GAYS?
BETH: THE JOCK, PRINCESS, THE GEEK, THE REBEL.
KYM: UNH-UNH, DON'T YOU DARE TRY STUFFING ME IN ONE OF YOUR BOXES.
AMIR: WHAT ABOUT YOU?
KYM: THAT'S EASY. SHE THE BASKET CASE. AND CAN YOU PUT THAT THING OUT? MANNY HAS ASTHMA.
BETH: WHATEVER.
AMIR: IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
BETH: HEY, POINTS FOR THE CALLBACK.
BETH: I HATE PARTIES. ALWAYS FULL OF PEOPLE.
SHANE: YEAH, WELL, I GOT A GOOD FEELING YOU'RE GONNA LIKE THIS ONE. HOW ABOUT I CONVINCE YOU IN PRIVATE?
BETH: FINE. YOU'RE ALL FREE TO GO. JUST BE BACK BY 4:00 SO WE DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS AGAIN TOMORROW, OKAY? MANNY: AND THEY SAY ROMANCE IS DEAD.
KYM: IF IT AIN'T, THESE TWO WEIRDOS ABOUT TO KILL IT.
DEION: DID Y'ALL SEE IT? SOMEBODY JUST JUMPED ME. SOME KIND OF GHOSTFACE.
BETH: THOUGHT I WAS THE FREAK.
DEION: I'M BEING SERIOUS. I CAN PROVE IT.
DEION: HE MUST'VE ERASED THE MESSAGES TO MAKE ME SEEM CRAZY.
BETH: THEN HE'S DOING A HELL OF A JOB.
SHANE: SO, YOU SATISFIED?
BETH: WITH THE PARTY? YES. WITH YOU, NOT YET.
DEION: Y'ALL IN DANGER. SOMEBODY'S THREATENING TO KILL ONE OF Y'ALL.
BETH: LET ME GUESS: GHOSTFACE.
BETH: HELLO?
AVERY: WHERE YOU GOING, BETH? I LIKE YOUR PIERCINGS. I HAVE SOMETHING ELSE YOU CAN STICK IN YOUR FACE.
BETH: OH, YEAH? DEPENDS ON WHO'S DOING THE STICKING.
AVERY: WHO DO YOU WANT ME TO BE?
BETH: WELL, DEFINITELY NOT AVERY COLLINS WHO HOOKED UP WITH ME AT THAT BLACKOUT KEGGER FRESHMAN YEAR, THEN NEVER CALLED ME AGAIN, AND WHOSE NUMBER I STILL HAVE IN MY PHONE FOR SOME REASON.
AMIR: IS HE DEAD? ASKING FOR REAL THIS TIME.
BETH: I DON'T KNOW. IT'S SO DIFFERENT THAN THE MOVIES.
KYM SO SOMEBODY HAS IT OUT FOR DEION. WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH THE REST OF US? AND WHY ARE WE IN THIS JANKY TATTOO SHOP?
BETH: BECAUSE I WORK HERE. CAN'T ANSWER THE OTHER QUESTION, THOUGH.
ALL: [CELL PHONES CHIMING,
AMIR: "SHOW ME YOUR INSIDES"? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
BETH: IT MEANS WE'RE IN A HORROR MOVIE.
KYM: THAT'S YOUR LIFE, EDWARD SCISSORHANDS. NOT OURS.
BETH: OKAY, THAT'S NOT EVEN A HORROR MOVIE. AND IT'S YOUR LIFE NOW, TOO. DON'T YOU GUYS GET IT? WE'RE BEING HUNTED BY A KILLER HERE. KILLERS HAVE CODES AND HORROR HAS RULES.
DEION: WAIT, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT HORROR HAD A PLAYBOOK.
BETH: WELL, IT DOES, AND IT PLAYS BY IT, MEANING I'VE GOT SOME BAD NEWS, YOU GUYS. WE'RE NOT THE TYPE OF CHARACTERS TO MAKE IT TO THE END.
LIV: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
BETH: OKAY. RELAX, PRINCESS. YOU HAVE "FINAL GIRL" POTENTIAL. THE REST OF US, GOTH, GEEK, GAY, NOT A CHANCE. WE'RE USUALLY THE FIRST BODY THAT DROPS.
DEION: OKAY, WELL, WHAT ABOUT ME AND KYM?
BETH: DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, BUT YOU GUYS ARE BLACK.
KYM: GIRL.
BETH: IN HORROR, THAT'S PRETTY MUCH AN INSTA-KILL.
AMIR: BUT AVERY WAS ONE OF THE WHITEST PEOPLE I'VE EVER SEEN. I MEAN, HE PRACTICALLY GLOWED IN THE DARK, SO WHY DID HE DIE?
DEION: BECAUSE HE WASN'T WHO HE SAID HE WAS. ON THE INSIDE.
LIV: DEION'S RIGHT. AVERY PRETENDED TO BE A NICE GUY, BUT DEEP DOWN, HE WAS A TOTAL RACIST.
KYM: DOES THAT JIVE WITH YOUR FREAKY RULES?
BETH: LET'S HOPE NOT. BECAUSE IF THAT'S THE KILLER'S GAME, WE'RE NOT THE BREAKFAST CLUB. WE'RE THE DEADFAST CLUB. AND I'M PRETTY SURE WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE
BETH: AS MUCH AS I'D LOVE TO SIT AROUND HERE AND MOURN THE DEARLY DEPARTED, CAN WE PLEASE GET BACK TO THE ISSUE AT HAND HERE? KYM ALMOST GOT KILLED LAST NIGHT.
DEION: SO WE KNOW THAT THE KILLER'S AFTER US, BUT WHY WOULD HE KILL LT? KYM: HE WAS TRYING TO KILL ME. BUT HE DID SAY SOMETHING ABOUT LATAVIOUS BEING A HYPOCRITE, WHICH IS TRUE. BUT LT WAS ALSO FINE. I DID NOT MIND HIM HOLLERING AT ME.
BETH: I KEEP TELLING YOU GUYS, KILLERS HAVE CODES.
MANNY: CODE OR NO CODE, I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN THERE SOONER.
KYM: AND DO WHAT? HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK? I LOVE YOU, MANNY, BUT CONFLICT ISN'T YOUR STRONG SUIT.
DEION: MAYBE BETH'S RIGHT. BECAUSE IF THE KILLER WENT AFTER KYM, THEN HE'S KEEPING GOOD ON HIS WORD.
MANNY: I THINK WE SHOULD CALL THE COPS.
BETH: NO, NO. IN HORROR MOVIES, THE COPS ARE TOTALLY USELESS. THEY DON'T BELIEVE THE VICTIMS UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE.
KYM: WORKS THAT WAY IN REAL LIFE, TOO. BY THE TIME FIVE-0 GOT THERE LAST NIGHT, THEY ALREADY HAD THEIR STORY STRAIGHT. APPARENTLY, DOPE DEALERS LIKE MASKS JUST AS MUCH AS PSYCHOPATHS DO.
DEION: BETH, IF WE'RE TRAPPED IN A HORROR MOVIE HOW DO WE SURVIVE?
KYM: BY NOT LISTENING TO HER. I DID THE RESEARCH, Y'ALL, AND THE TYPE OF HORROR MOVIES THAT BETH'S TALKING ABOUT ARE WHITE PEOPLE IN WHITE-PEOPLE PLACES MAKING DUMB WHITE-PEOPLE MISTAKES.
BETH: DUH. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HORROR IS.
KYM: NUH-UH. THERE ARE HORROR MOVIES WITH BLACK FOLKS, TOO.
BETH: OH, REALLY? NAME ONE. BESIDES GET OUT.
KYM: I DON'T HAVE TO BECAUSE WE'RE MAKING OUR OWN RULES JUST LIKE JORDAN PEELE.
AMIR: NO SPOILERS. I HAVEN'T SEEN IT YET.
KYM: IT AIN'T A SPOILER WHEN IT'S THE TITLE. CHRIS GETS OUT. HE SURVIVED BY GOING STRAIGHT AT THE KILLERS, AND I SAY WE DO THE SAME.
BETH: CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS, BUT I THINK KYM'S RIGHT. THINK ABOUT IT. IN MOST HORROR MOVIES, NOBODY ACTUALLY GOES AFTER THE KILLER UNTIL ALMOST EVERYBODY'S DEAD. IF WE DO THAT NOW, WE FLIP THE SCRIPT.
BETH: DO YOU GUYS WANNA FLIP A COIN AND SEE WHO'S GONNA CALL THE PRINCESS AND LET HER KNOW? AS LONG AS BOTH SIDES SAY "NOT ME.
FITCH: THANK YOU, WEAVER HIGH AV CLUB, FOR THAT EMOTIONAL PRESENTATION. AVERY LEFT THIS WORLD TOO SOON, BUT HE'S IN A BETTER PLACE.
BETH: ARE YOU CRYING?
AMIR: NO. NOT FOR AVERY. THIS SONG JUST ALWAYS GETS ME.
KYM: I'M PRETTY SURE I JUST FIGURED OUT WHO THE KILLER IS. WHO WAS IN DETENTION THAT GAVE US THE INVITATION? WHO'S THE ONE THAT GAVE US THE FREAKY COSTUMES? WHO WAS THE ONE AT THE DOOR COLLECTING ALL THAT CASH? SHANE.
AMIR: SO SHANE IS FADE?
KYM: AND FADE IS GHOSTFACE.
MANNY: BUT WHY WOULD SHANE KILL AVERY?
BETH: AVERY USED TO BUY FROM SHANE ALL THE TIME. MAYBE A DEAL WENT BAD?
BETH: WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? TAKE IT.
AMIR: I'VE NEVER STOLEN FROM MY PARENTS BEFORE.
BETH: WE'RE NOT STEALING, OKAY? WE'RE BORROWING. THE MONEY'S JUST BAIT.
AMIR: STILL, A THOUSAND BUCKS. THAT'S A LOT OF CASH. COULDN'T WE TAKE LESS? BETH: NO, LESS WON'T WORK. WE NEED SHANE TO BELIEVE THIS IS A LEGIT DEAL.
AMIR: OKAY. BUT WHEN THIS IS DONE, ALL THE MONEY GOES BACK, RIGHT? BETH: EVERY LAST DOLLAR.
BETH: [HOLDING A GUN.] BANG, YOU'RE DEAD.
AMIR: ARE YOU CRAZY? PUT THAT BACK!
BETH: WE'RE ABOUT TO CONFRONT A PSYCHO KILLER. WE NEED TO BRING THIS.
AMIR: NO, NO. THE GUN STAYS, OKAY? WE CAN TAKE THE MONEY. BUT MY PARENTS NEED THAT TO PROTECT THEMSELVES AND THE SHOP. PUT IT BACK.
BETH: YOU KNOW, EVEN LUKE SKYWALKER DIPPED HIS TOE INTO THE DARK SIDE ONCE.
AMIR: WAIT, YOU LIKE STAR WARS, TOO? [MIMICS DARTH VADER.] THE FORCE IS STRONG WITH THIS ONE.
BETH: WAY TO RUIN THE MOMENT, NERD.
BETH: THAT DEFORMED ELEPHANT GONNA ACTUALLY WORK? IT BETTER.
MANNY: IT WILL.
KYM: YOU GOT THE CASH?
BETH: RIGHT HERE. AMIR'S ON LOOKOUT. I TOLD HIM TO KILL THE LIGHTS THE SECOND SHANE COMES IN.
MANNY: I'M SURPRISED HE LET YOU OUT OF SIGHT.
BETH: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
MANNY: HE'S INTO YOU. IT'S OBVIOUS.
BETH: I WOULD DESTROY THAT KID.
SHANE: BETH, I THOUGHT WE HAD A DEAL.
BETH: THAT WAS THE POINT. I LIED.
SHANE: WHAT? THAT'S MESSED UP. I NEED THAT MONEY.
MANNY: TO THROW ANOTHER MURDER PARTY?
SHANE: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? KYM: NO. YOU DON'T GET TO ASK THE QUESTIONS, PUSHER MAN. I DO. NOW, I WANNA KNOW WHY YOU TRIED TO KILL ME LAST NIGHT.
SHANE: IF I WANTED TO KILL YOU, YOU'D BE DEAD. I STILL DON'T SEE WHERE YOU'RE GOING WITH THIS.
KYM: HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS?
SHANE: YEAH SO WHAT? Y'ALL WERE AT THE PARTY. WE ALL HAVE ONE.
KYM: YEAH, BECAUSE YOU GAVE THEM TO US. SO YOU COULD HIDE YOUR FACE WHILE YOU KILLED AVERY.
SHANE: WAIT, WAIT, YOU THINK I HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT? IT WAS YOUR PARTY, WASN'T IT? YEAH, YEAH, OKAY, I'M MR.FADE, BUT I AIN'T NO KILLER. AVERY'S DEATH WAS AN ACCIDENT, RIGHT?
BETH: WRONG.
KYM: WHAT ABOUT THE COSTUMES? WHY ARE YOU MESSING WITH DEION LIKE THAT?
SHANE: MESSING WITH DEION? THEY'RE JUST COSTUMES. GOES WITH THE WHOLE MR. FADE ANONYMITY THING, YOU FEEL ME?
KYM: WHERE'D YOU GET THEM?
SHANE: I GOT HOOKUPS EVERYWHERE. ONE OF MY BOYS GOT THEM FOR ME. DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE. ALL I KNOW IS THEY'RE TWO BUCKS EACH.
BETH: DO YOU REALLY EXPECT US TO BELIEVE THAT?
SHANE: YEAH, I DO, BECAUSE I'M NOT A LYING BITCH LIKE YOU, BETH. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO LURED ME IN HERE, TIED ME UP. FOR ALL I KNOW, IT WAS ONE OF YOU THAT SENT ME THAT CREEPY-ASS TEXT, TOO.
KYM: WAIT, WHAT TEXT?
SHANE: CHECK MY PHONE. I THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE, BUT IF THERE'S A KILLER OUT THERE, I GUESS HE'S AFTER ME, TOO.
AMIR: SO IF SHANE ISN'T GHOSTFACE...
BETH: THEN WHO THE HELL IS?
GHOSTFACE: ATTENTION, WEAVER HIGH STUDENTS. SLASH IS NOW IN SESSION, AND IT'S TIME FOR ONE OF YOU TO DIE.
KYM: I DON'T PLAN ON BEING HERE WHEN HIS ASS FINALLY SHOWS UP.
BETH: ROOKIE MISTAKE. WHEN THE KILLER'S IN YOUR MIDST, THE LAST THING YOU DO IS HEAD OFF BY YOURSELF. THAT'S ALMOST AS STUPID AS SAYING, "I'LL BE RIGHT BACK." EITHER WAY, YOU'RE DEAD MEAT.
KYM: FOR THE LAST TIME, CRUELLA, I'M NOT IN ONE OF YOUR DAMN HORROR MOVIES. OKAY?
AMIR: I'M NOT ACTUALLY GONNA DIE, RIGHT? BECAUSE MY PARENTS WILL KILL ME.
BETH: NO. RELAX. YOU MADE THE RIGHT CALL, OKAY? NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS WAIT UNTIL WE HEAR KYM AND MANNY SCREAM. THEN WE BOUNCE.
AMIR: WHY WHY WOULD THEY SCREAM? BETH: PROBABLY BECAUSE GHOSTFACE STUCK A KNIFE IN THEM.
AMIR: THAT'S MESSED UP.
SHANE: WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT, AMIR. SHE IS MESSED UP. WHICH IS WHY YOU SHOULD FOLLOW MY LEAD OUT THE DOOR.
BETH: TRUST ME, YOU DO NOT WANNA GO OUT THERE ALONE.
AMIR: OKAY, I KNOW YOU'RE THE EXPERT, BUT WHY ARE WE IN HERE, EXACTLY?
BETH: BECAUSE STORAGE CLOSETS ARE A CLASSIC HORROR HIDING PLACE.
AMIR: DOES THAT MEAN WE'RE SAFE?
BETH: 80-20. ALMOST ALWAYS WORKS.
AMIR: AND WHEN IT DOESN'T?
BETH: IT GOES HORRIBLY WRONG.
BETH: SSH.
AMIR: THAT WAS CLO—
BETH: SHH, SHH! OKAY, NOW WE'RE SAFE.
AMIR: HOW DID YOU KNOW HE WAS GONNA COME BACK?
BETH: 'CAUSE THE KILLER ALWAYS COMES BACK. I DON'T MAKE THE RULES, DONUT BOY. I JUST PLAY BY THEM.
AMIR: CAN WE GET OUT OF HERE, PLEASE?
BETH: SURE. I MEAN, IF THAT'S WHAT YOU REALLY WANT.
AMIR: I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT. ALL I KNOW IS YOU SMELL LIKE SKITTLES AND SMOKE. IT'S INTOXICATING.
BETH: WELL, THEN WHY DON'T YOU TASTE THE RAINBOW? KISS ME, AMIR. I DARE YOU.
AMIR: SHANE WAS RIGHT. YOU ARE CRAZY. [THUDS.]
BETH: GREAT. NOW WE GOTTA GO OR WE GET GUTTED.
KYM: WHERE'S BETH?
AMIR: I'M NOT SURE. WE GOT SEPARATED.
KYM: HOW CONVENIENT. WHEN THE KILLER'S COMING FOR MY ASS, YOU AND MORTICIA MAKE A RUN FOR IT.
BETH: I'M HERE. TOTALLY IN ONE PIECE, SO YOU CAN QUIT WORRYING ABOUT ME NOW. OH, AND BY THE WAY, I TAKE MORTICIA ADDAMS AS A COMPLIMENT, SO, THANKS.
SHANE: LET'S GO. I'LL WALK YOU HOME.
BETH: THINK I'M GONNA ROLL WITH THE GEEK. AT LEAST I KNOW HE'S A PUSSY.
BETH: YOUR PARENTS REALLY KNOW THEIR STUFF, HUH?
AMIR: YEAH, JELLY'S THEIR SPECIALTY. THAT'LL BE A BUCK.
BETH: MM. PUT IT ON MY TAB. I WASN'T, UH I WASN'T TALKING ABOUT THE DONUT, FYI. I MEAN, LOOK AT YOU. THEY MUST'VE RAISED YOU RIGHT.
AMIR: I NEVER REALLY HAD ANOTHER OPTION.
BETH: YOU DID TONIGHT, IN THAT CLOSET.
AMIR: ACTUALLY, I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THAT.
BETH: WHAT, HAVING REGRETS?
AMIR: MY ONLY REGRET IS I ALMOST DID SOMETHING I WOULD HAVE REGRETTED.
BETH: THAT'S A REALLY CONFUSING SENTENCE.
AMIR: I KNOW. IT'S ALL VERY CONFUSING.
BETH: DOESN'T HAVE TO BE.
AMIR: YOU'RE RIGHT. MY PARENTS RAISED ME A CERTAIN WAY.BUT AT SOME POINT, I HAD TO MAKE A CHOICE. THEIR BELIEFS ARE MY BELIEFS, TOO. AND I BELIEVE I BELIEVE WE SHOULD JUST BE FRIENDS.THIS IS A BAD IDEA.
BETH: RELAX, SKYWALKER. YOU'RE NOT MY TYPE ANYWAY. I JUST THOUGHT MAYBE YOU'D WANNA GO OUT WITH A BANG.
BETH: IT'S HALLOWEEN. THE ONE DAY A YEAR YOU GET TO BE ANYTHING YOU WANNA BE, AND YOU CHOSE TO DRESS UP AS SOME MEATHEAD JOCK?
AMIR: OF COURSE NOT. MOST JOCKS TREAT ME LIKE CRAP, BUT NOT DEION. I FEEL LIKE HE HAS MY BACK.
BETH: IN MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THE ONLY PERSON PEOPLE EVER LOOK OUT FOR IS THEMSELVES.
AMIR: THAT'S SAD.
BETH: NOT AS SAD AS YOU GOING FULL-ON STALKER ON DEION.
AMIR: I'M NOT A STALKER.
BETH: WELL, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT A STALKER WOULD SAY.
AMIR: HEY, WAIT UP. DID YOU HEAR ABOUT SHANE?
BETH: WHAT ABOUT HIM? LIV JUST TOLD ME. HE'S DEAD. WE'RE GUESSING GHOSTFACE GOT HIM.
BETH: WELL, THEN I GUESS MR. FADE GOT FADED.
AMIR: I'M SORRY. I KNOW YOU GUYS WERE ACTUALLY, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU GUYS WERE.
BETH: WHAT I HAD WITH SHANE WAS JUST SEX AND NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.
AMIR: WHATEVER IT WAS, IF YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT I DON'T.
BETH: AND WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE ANYWAYS? LAST NIGHT, I OFFERED YOU A NO-STRINGS HOOKUP, AND YOU PASSED. AND NOW YOU WANNA OFFER ME A SHOULDER TO CRY ON? COME ON, AMIR. NOBODY'S THAT NICE.
AMIR: LAST NIGHT, I TOLD YOU I WANTED TO BE FRIENDS, BETH. I MEANT THAT.
BETH: THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE, NOT A ROM-COM, SO DON'T GET ANY WEIRD IDEAS. BESIDES, YOU BARELY EVEN KNOW ME.
AMIR: NOT FOR LACK OF TRYING.
BETH: OKAY, WELL, YOU WANNA DO SOMETHING FOR ME? STOP TRYING.
KYM: UNLESS MARCUS CAME BACK AS A ZOMBIE, THERE'S NO WAY HE'S GHOSTFACE.
BETH: YEAH, BUT IF IT REALLY IS MARCUS UNDER THAT MASK, THEN DEION'S DOOMED. IN HORROR, THE KILLER OFTENTIMES TRIES TO TAKE OUT THE MAIN CHARACTER BY LURING HIM TO A PLACE OF SIGNIFICANCE ON THE NIGHT OF HIS ORIGIN.
KYM: ONLY TO BE TAKEN OUT BY THE HERO INSTEAD. I'VE SEEN THOSE MOVIES, TOO, ELVIRA. I KNOW HOW THEY WORK. AND LIKE I'VE TOLD YOU, THIS HERE'S A REBOOT. AND REBOOTS DON'T PLAY BY YOUR RULES.
BETH: BECAUSE REBOOTS SUCK.
BETH: PRINCESS HERE GOT IT IN HER HEAD YOU WERE ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING STUPID, WHICH, CLEARLY, YOU ARE.
BETH: CRAP. SORRY, I THINK I'M SHORT.
AMIR: THIS SHOULD COVER IT.
BETH: THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO STOP TRYING.
AMIR: TRYING TO DO WHAT?
BETH: COME ON, WE BOTH KNOW WHAT YOU REALLY WANT FROM ME.
AMIR: IS IT REALLY THAT HARD FOR YOU TO BELIEVE I JUST WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND? BETH: EVERYONE'S GOT AN ANGLE, AMIR, EVEN YOU.
AMIR: I DON’T LIVE MY LIFE THAT WAY, AND I THINK IT'S SAD THAT YOU DO.
BETH: WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD START, 'CAUSE LAST TIME I CHECKED, YOU DON'T HAVE THAT MANY FRIENDS EITHER. AT LEAST I'M MAKING A CHOICE.
BETH: THIS IS REALLY BAD, YOU GUYS.
MANNY: OBVIOUSLY. WHO EVEN DOES THAT?
KYM: I HAVE MY SUSPICIONS.
BETH: THOSE RANDOS? NO, THOSE ARE JUST GLORIFIED EXTRAS. AND THE KNIFE, WELL, IT'S A CLASSIC PLOT POINT.
KYM: FOR THE LAST TIME, REBOOT, BITCH. AND THOSE GOOD OL' BOYS ARE ABOUT TO PAY FOR WHAT THEY DID.
BETH: OKAY, REBOOT OR NOT, IT DOESN'T MATTER. MANNY, WE'RE THE SECONDARY CHARACTERS HERE, RIGHT? THE COMIC RELIEF, THE SIDEKICK.
MANNY: THE KNOW-IT-ALL?
BETH: CALL ME WHATEVER YOU WANT. NOW THAT WE'RE STRANDED, WE'RE A BUNCH OF SITTING DUCKS, AND THAT'S USUALLY WHEN EVERYTHING GOES WRONG FOR PEOPLE LIKE US.
MANNY: LIKE, HOW WRONG?
BETH: WELL, THE LONGER WE'RE STUCK OUT HERE, CUT OFF FROM THE OTHERS, THE MORE WE'LL START TO SLOWLY UNRAVEL UNTIL ONE OF US INEVITABLY GOES OFF AND DOES SOMETHING STUPID. AND THEN, WELL, I THINK WE BOTH KNOW WHAT HAPPENS THEN, RIGHT? LONG STORY SHORT ONE OF US IS GONNA DIE.
BETH: ARE YOU GUYS SERIOUSLY ARGUING ABOUT NOT GETTING DELIVERANCED?
BETH: WOW. YOU REALLY ARE DEAD TO HER.
MANNY: YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED, BUT KYM DOESN'T LIKE WHEN PEOPLE STAND UP TO HER.
BETH: SO SHE ONLY WANTS YOU AROUND WHEN YOU'RE DOING EXACTLY WHAT SHE WANTS? SOME FRIEND.
MANNY: MORE LIKE A SISTER. PUSHES MY BUTTONS LIKE NO OTHER. BUT, HEY SIBLINGS FIGHT, RIGHT?
BETH: AND SMASH EACH OTHER'S CARS? YEAH, DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE COMING.
MANNY: HURRY UP!
BETH: I'M TRYING. SORRY, THESE SHOES AREN'T MADE FOR RUNNING.
MANNY: THOSE BOOTS ARE AWFUL, BY THE WAY.
BETH: SCREW YOU.
BETH: DID YOU RUN ALL THE WAY HERE?
AMIR: FOR THE FIRST MILE. AFTER THAT, IT WAS MORE LIKE A PAINFUL JOG.
BETH: WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT?
AMIR: BECAUSE LIV SLASHED YOUR GUYS' TIRE AND LEFT YOU—
BETH: WAIT, WAIT, HOLD UP. LIV DID THAT?
AMIR:!YEAH, BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER. ALL THAT MATTERS IS YOU'RE OKAY.
BETH: DAMN. YOU REALLY ARE THAT NICE. GUESS I WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU.
AMIR: ACTUALLY, I THINK YOU WERE RIGHT. MAYBE I DO HAVE AN ANGLE 'CAUSE I DO WANT SOMETHING FROM YOU. SOMETHING MORE THAN JUST FRIENDS.
BETH: HAVE YOU EVER EVEN KISSED A GIRL BEFORE?
AMIR: DOES IT MATTER?
BETH: NOT TO ME.
KYM; WHERE'S MANNY? I THOUGHT I THOUGHT HE WAS WITH YOU.
BETH: HE SAW THOSE REDNECKS HEADED YOUR WAY AND HE RAN OFF TO SAVE YOU.
DEION: WE GOTTA STICK TOGETHER, Y'ALL.
LIV: NOT IF IT'S ONE OF US DOING THIS.
KYM: ONE OF US? I KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUGGESTING THAT I COULD'VE KILLED MANNY.
LIV: IT'S JUST A THEORY.
BETH: YOU SEEM TO HAVE A LOT OF THEORIES LATELY, LIV. DO YOU THINK THE KILLER COULD'VE DONE SOMETHING LIKE SLASH KYM'S TIRE? BECAUSE AMIR TOLD ME YOU DID THAT.
DEION: LIV DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THE KILLER WAS PLANNING, KYM.
BETH: KNEW ENOUGH TO GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE BEFORE HOOKMAN GOT GUTTED. YOU SAID YOU COULDN'T FIND HER, RIGHT, DEION?
LIV: BECAUSE I WAS LOOKING FOR AMIR. HE DISAPPEARED.
AMIR: BECAUSE I WAS TRYING TO HELP BETH, AND KYM AND MANNY, TOO. DON'T TRY TO PIN THIS ON ME. GHOSTFACE ALMOST GOT BETH AND I WHEN WE WERE AT THE SCHOOL TO TRAP SHANE.
BETH: YEAH. AND YOU KNOW WHO WASN'T THERE THAT NIGHT? LIV.
LIV: I WAS AT HOME, OKAY? MY DAD WOULDN'T LET ME OUT OF THE HOUSE.
BETH: YOUR COP DAD. I'M GUESSING HE DOESN'T KNOW HIS BABY GIRL'S BEING STALKED BY A SERIAL KILLER, OR ELSE THE WHOLE DEPARTMENT WOULD BE UP THE KILLER'S ASS BY NOW.
DEION: THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND HIM.
AMIR: OR HER. IT COULD BE A HER, TOO, RIGHT?
BETH: TOTALLY.
AMIR: YOU THINK WE CAN TRUST THE OTHERS?
BETH: HELL, NO. DO YOU?
AMIR: I DON'T KNOW. I WANT TO. I MEAN LIKE, IF NO ONE TEXTS A NAME, WON'T THE KILLER BE PISSED? I DON'T KNOW.
BETH: I'M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE KILLER'S GAME. BUT IF HE OR SHE THINKS THAT ONE OF US IS GONNA GIVE UP A NAME, MAYBE THERE'S SOMETHING TO IT.
AMIR: WELL, I PROMISE I WON'T SELL YOU OUT.
BETH: YOU'RE NEVER GONNA SURVIVE THIS THING BY LOOKING OUT FOR ME. YOU NEED TO WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
AMIR: BUT I'M INTO YOU, BETH. THOUGHT I MADE THAT CLEAR OUT IN THE BOONIES.
BETH: YOU'RE NOT THE WORST PERSON IN THE WORLD, EITHER. BUT THAT MUSHY STUFF IS A PERFECT DISTRACTION FOR A KILLER THAT'S JUST WAITING FOR US TO DROP OUR GUARD. SO MAYBE IT'S BETTER IF YOU JUST STAY AWAY UNTIL ALL THIS IS OVER.
AMIR: UH, HI. I'M LOOKING FOR BETH. OH, WOW, BETH, YOU LOOK AWESOME.
BETH: I JUST GOT OUT OF THE SHOWER. AND NORMALLY I LOOK?
AMIR: DIFFERENT. ALSO AWESOME. YOU HAVE A HEARSE IN YOUR DRIVEWAY.
BETH: YEAH. THIS IS A FUNERAL HOME, AND IT'S MY HOME, TOO.
AMIR: THAT ACTUALLY EXPLAINS A LOT.
BETH: WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
AMIR: SOMEONE GOT PICKED.
BETH: YEAH, I SAW.
AMIR: SO, I WAS THINKING WE COULD LOOK OUT FOR EACH OTHER?
BETH: DID WHAT I TELL YOU GO RIGHT THROUGH YOUR DONUT HOLE AND OUT THE OTHER SIDE? IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA.
AMIR: YOU'RE WATCHING HORROR MOVIES AT A TIME LIKE THIS?
BETH: I'M LOOKING FOR CLUES, PATTERNS. BECAUSE WE HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT'S NEXT, AMIR. FIND THE NEXT PLOT TWIST SO WE CAN STAY ONE STEP AHEAD.
AMIR: WELL, IF ANY OF THAT INVOLVES ME STAYING AWAY FROM YOU, YOU CAN FORGET IT.
BETH: LOOK I DON'T WANT ANYTHING BAD TO HAPPEN TO YOU BECAUSE OF ME. WE ALL HAVE ROLES TO PLAY IN THIS.
YOU MIGHT BE THE NICE GUY, BUT I'M THE BITCH. GOOD FOR A FEW QUIPS, MAYBE A BOOB FLASH, AND THEN I'M THE ONE THAT EVERYBODY WANTS TO SEE DIE. AND THEY CHEER WHEN IT HAPPENS, LIKE WHEN THAT WHEELCHAIR DUDE GETS CARVED UP IN TEXAS CHAINSAW.
AMIR: BUT THAT WON'T HAPPEN TO ME BECAUSE YOU WON'T LET IT. I MEAN, YOU KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS STUFF.
BETH: NO. I ACT LIKE I DO. TRYING TO BE ALL COOL AND COLLECTED, LIKE WATCHING THESE MOVIES MEANS I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT, BUT THIS IS REAL LIFE. AND THE TRUTH IS I'M JUST AS LOST AND TERRIFIED AS YOU ARE.
AMIR: HEY. IT'S OKAY.
BETH: JUST BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S COMING NEXT DOESN'T MEAN I'M NOT GONNA FIGHT BACK.
AMIR: YOU GOT AN EXTRA ONE FOR ME?
BETH: KEEP IT. YOU'RE RIGHT. NOWHERE IS SAFE. GHOSTFACE COULD'VE GOT YOU WORKING YOUR SHIFT ALONE.
AMIR: I GOT AHEAD OF HIM ON THAT ONE.
BETH: OR HE COULD BE LYING IN WAIT FOR KYM OUTSIDE MANNY'S PLACE.
AMIR: WHAT ABOUT LIV?
BETH:I MEAN, SHE'S THE NEW GIRL. SHE'S OBSESSED WITH DEION. AND, I MEAN, SHE'S BEEN MIA ANY TIME I'VE SEEN THE KILLER.
AMIR: YOU REALLY THINK LIV'S GHOSTFACE?
BETH: SHE SAID IT WAS ONE OF US, DIDN'T SHE?
AMIR: BUT IF SHE'S THE KILLER, SHE WOULDN'T HURT DEION, RIGHT? SHE SEEMS SO INTO HIM.
BETH: THAT'S WHAT MAKES HIM THE EASIEST TARGET OF ALL. YOU SEE, DEION THINKS HE'S THE HERO OF THIS STORY, SO ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS TUG AT HIS HEARTSTRINGS.TELL HIM SOMEBODY'S IN DANGER, A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS WHO NEEDS HIS HELP. OR SO HE THINKS. SHE'D LULL HIM INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY WITH SOME "WOE IS ME" SOB STORY. THEN SHE'D COMPLIMENT HIM, FEED HIS EGO, MAKE HIM FEEL WANTED. THEN, WHEN HIS GUARD IS DOWN—
AMIR: SHE STABS HIM IN THE HEART.
BETH. NO. WHEN HIS GUARD IS DOWN, SHE...
AMIR: WHAT, JUST LIKE THAT?
BETH: WHY NOT? IT'S JUST SEX. SHE HAS TO GET HIM WHEN HE'S AT HIS MOST VULNERABLE BEFORE SHE CAN GO IN FOR THE KILL. AND YOU WANNA KNOW THE WORST PART ABOUT IT ALL? HE NEVER SEES IT COMING.
BETH: [CRASHING.] [SCREAMING.] THIS IS AWESOME. IT SOUNDS LIKE IT'S FROM A SOUNDTRACK OR SOMETHING.
AMIR: WELL, I SAMPLED SOME AUDIO FROM SOME OF THOSE HORROR MOVIES YOU MENTIONED.
BETH: WAIT, YOU YOU MADE THIS?
AMIR: AND THE FIRST ONE. OTHER STUFF, TOO, BUT, YEAH, THIS ONE WAS JUST FOR YOU. I CALL IT "BETH METAL."
BETH: YOUR STUFF'S REALLY GOOD. DOES EVERYBODY KNOW YOU MAKE MUSIC?
AMIR: NO. I GUESS I WAS AFRAID OF WHAT PEOPLE WOULD THINK. BUT THEN GHOSTFACE SHOWED UP, AND SUDDENLY WHAT PEOPLE THOUGHT OF ME WASN'T SO SCARY ANYMORE. NOT WHEN I COULD DIE AT ANY TIME.
BETH: WELL, THAT WAS ALWAYS TECHNICALLY TRUE.
BETH: ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?
AMIR: COME HERE. JUST RELAX.
BETH: FINE. YOU GOT ME. I CAN'T DANCE. POINT FOR THE NERD.
AMIR: HOW MANY POINTS UNTIL I LEVEL UP?
BETH: HMM. FEELS LIKE YOU ALREADY HAVE. UH, WAIT. MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T DO THIS.
AMIR: I'M SORRY IF I WAS—
BETH: NO. IT'S IT'S NOT THAT. IT'S JUST HAVING SEX WITH A KILLER ON THE LOOSE.
AMIR: WAIT. WE'RE GONNA HAVE SEX? - BETH: YEAH. I MEAN, I JUST DON'T WANNA GET BUSY, AND THEN GET, LIKE, AN ARROW TO THE NECK OR—
AMIR: YOU'LL BE SAFE TONIGHT, I PROMISE.
BETH: I HOPE YOU'RE THIS WEIRD IN BED.
BETH: SOMEBODY TEXTED DEION'S NAME.
AMIR: DID IT SAY WHO IT WAS?
BETH: WHOEVER IT WAS, IT'S PRETTY COWARDLY TO DO IT BEHIND EVERYONE'S BACK LIKE THAT.
AMIR: MAYBE IT WAS JUST SELF-PRESERVATION.
BETH: OH, MY GOD. IT WAS YOU.
BETH: GHOSTFACE.
AMIR: NO ONE IS OUT THERE.
BETH: WHAT? NO. NO, I JUST SAW HIM.
AMIR: TRY TO CALM DOWN.
BETH: AMIR, I'M TELLING YOU WE'RE IN SERIOUS TROUBLE HERE.
KYM: HEY.
BETH: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
KYM: COPS TALK TO YOU ABOUT AMIR?
BETH: YEAH, ONLY ALL NIGHT.
KYM: IF YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT, I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH.
BETH: THEN PLEASE, TELL ME, WHAT WHAT AM I GOING THROUGH?
KYM: GRIEF, PAIN. YOU LOST YOUR DUDE JUST LIKE I LOST MANNY.
BETH: YOU AND MANNY WERE BEST FRIENDS. I DIDN'T I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW AMIR.
KYM: EITHER WAY, BETH, KILLER TOOK A LOT FROM US BOTH. SPEAKING OF I'VE BEEN THINKING A LOT ABOUT WHAT DEION SAID LAST NIGHT ABOUT LIV.
BETH: ABOUT HOW SHE'S GHOSTFACE? - KYM: MM-HMM. AND I WAS ALSO THINKING THAT MAYBE WE SHOULD FIND OUT FOR SURE. INVESTIGATE HER TOGETHER.
BETH: TEAM UP? RIGHT, THAT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA.
KYM: GIRL, WE RIGGS AND MURTAUGH.
BETH: WHAT?
KYM: WE JUST LEFT THE WORLD OF HORROR — GOOD RIDDANCE, BY THE WAY — AND NOW WE BUDDY COPS. TWO POLICE OFFICERS, DIFFERENT CULTURES, DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES, FORCED TO BE PARTNERS.
BETH: SO NOT MY GENRE.
KYM: BUT IT'S MINE, THOUGH, OKAY? 48 HRS, RUSH HOUR, LETHAL WEAPON, TURNER & HOOCH. WELL, THAT LAST ONE'S ABOUT A WHITE GUY AND A DOG, BUT YOU GET THE POINT. LOOK, I KNOW WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE CURLED UP IN A CORNER CRYING SOMEWHERE, BUT I'VE DONE ENOUGH OF THAT. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I COULD REALLY USE SOME COMPANY WHILE I TRY TO FIGURE OUT WHO KILLED MY FRIENDS OUR FRIENDS.
BETH: ONE CONDITION. AM I CHRIS TUCKER OR JACKIE CHAN?
KYM: BITCH, I'M BOTH.
BETH: SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN PARTNER. [IMITATES GUNSHOT.
LIV: IF HE DIES, BLOOD WILL BE ON BOTH OUR HANDS, SO CALL ME BACK, OR BETTER YET, SHOW UP.
KYM: DAMN.
BETH: YEAH. THAT WAS HARSH, EVEN FOR ME.
LIV: YOU GUYS HERE TO MONITOR HOW POLITE I AM ON THE PHONE? WHAT DO YOU WANT?
BETH: TO KNOW WHO YOU WERE TALKING TO, FOR STARTERS.
KYM: YEAH, ON THAT PHONE.
LIV: OH, I SEE WHAT THIS IS. YOU CAME TO INTERROGATE ME.
KYM: LET'S JUST CUT TO THE CHASE. WHY YOU ALWAYS MIA WHEN PEOPLE WIND UP DEAD, LIV?
BETH: YEAH. MANNY, AMIR?
LIV: MY DAD IS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE, AND YOU TWO HAVE THE NERVE TO BRING THIS HERE, NOW?
KYM: LOOK, ALL WE WANT IS SOME ANSWERS.
BETH: IF YOU'RE NOT THE KILLER—
LIV: “IF”? ALL RIGHT, SCREW BOTH OF YOU GUYS AND YOUR QUESTIONS. THINK WHATEVER YOU WANT. I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
BETH: WELL, THAT WENT WELL.
KYM: WE JUST CAME AT IT WRONG, IS ALL. AND WHEN AN INVESTIGATION HITS A SNAG IN A DETECTIVE MOVIE, BOOM! IT'S TIME FOR A LITTLE GOOD COP, BAD COP.
BETH: YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR MIND. NO, I AM NOT STAYING HERE.
KYM: YOU GOTTA. I NEED TO FIND DEION, AND HE'S NOT PICKING UP HIS PHONE.
BETH: SO, YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME ALONE HERE WITH A SERIAL KILLER?
KYM: THAT'S THE THING. I'M NOT SO SURE LIV'S THE KILLER ANYMORE.
BETH: WHY THE HELL NOT? SOME SOB STORY ABOUT HER PARENTS' DIVORCE AND DEION USING HER FOR SEX? NOWADAYS, WE CALL THAT SOPHOMORE YEAR.
KYM: CALL IT A GUT FEELING.
BETH: YOU'RE TAKING THIS GOOD-COP THING WAY TOO FAR, BECAUSE MY GUT FEELING SAYS LIV IS STILL OUR PRIME SUSPECT.
KYM: THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE THE BAD COP AND EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULD STAY HERE. KEEP AN EYE ON HER.
BETH: I THOUGHT WE WERE IN THIS TOGETHER.
KYM: YEAH. BUT THIS IS THE PART OF THE MOVIE WHERE THE PARTNERS SPLIT UP JUST FOR A FEW SCENES, THEN COME BACK TOGETHER TO SOLVE THE CASE. YOU DIDN'T SEE HOW BAD IT'S HITTING HER. SHE'S A MESS. AND IF SHE'S NOT THE KILLER, WE NEED TO BE STICKING TOGETHER. TRYING TO TALK SOME SENSE INTO DEION MIGHT ACTUALLY HELP, SO HAVE A HEART, BETH. I KNOW YOU HAVE ONE IN THERE.
BETH: GOD. I CAN'T STAND THIS FAMILY-BOY-SEX DRAMA. I'M SO NOT EQUIPPED.
BETH: YOU OKAY?
LIV: OBVIOUSLY.
BETH: YOU WANT TO I DON'T KNOW TALK ABOUT IT, OR?
LIV: WHAT, WITH YOU? YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE IF YOU DIDN'T THINK I WAS GHOSTFACE.
BETH: TECHNICALLY TRUE, BUT—
LIV: YOU KNOW WHAT? JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.
BETH: [AWKWARDLY.] I'M HERE FOR YOU.
BETH: DEION.
DEION: HEY, HEY. WHERE'S LIV?
BETH: I DON'T KNOW. SHE JUST HAD, LIKE, A MAJOR HISSY FIT AND BAILED.
DEION: KYM SAID SHE WAS WITH YOU, AND SHE'S NOT ANSWERING NONE OF MY CALLS.
BETH: YEAH, I DON'T BLAME HER. YOU PUMPED AND DUMPED, DUDE. WHAT'S GOING ON?
DEION: FIND HER, PLEASE. BUT YOU GUYS GOTTA GET OUT, OKAY? MY BROTHER JAY'S THE KILLER AND HE'S COMING FOR HER RIGHT NOW!
BETH: TWIST.
BETH: THERE YOU ARE. I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU MY WHOLE LIFE. THE MACHINE SPIT OUT TWO.
LIV: I'M NOT EVEN PISSED YOU GUYS WOULD THINK IT WAS ME. I MEAN, IT JUST HURTS THAT DEION WAS THINKING IT, TOO. HE DIDN'T EVEN GIVE ME A CHANCE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF THE WAY YOU AND KYM DID.
BETH: WELCOME TO DATING DUDES 2018.
LIV: AFTER WE HOOKED UP, I THOUGHT WE WERE CLOSER THAN THAT.
BETH: ME AND AMIR BANGED LAST NIGHT. I DON'T KNOW IF IT BROUGHT US CLOSER TOGETHER, IF IT EVEN MEANT ANYTHING OR WHATEVER, BUT I DO KNOW I WAS REALLY ROOTING FOR THAT KID. I WISH IT DIDN'T END LIKE THAT.
LIV: YEAH. ENDINGS ARE ROUGH.
BETH: THEN MAYBE DON'T LET THIS BE THE END OF YOU AND DEION.
LIV: HEY, YOU WANNA GET STARBUCKS OR SOMETHING?
BETH: YEAH, HARD PASS. LOOK, YOU'RE NOT AS LAME AS I THOUGHT YOU WERE, BUT WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS OR ANYTHING.
LIV: UH, OKAY. WHY NOT?
BETH: BECAUSE FRIENDS ARE BLIND SPOTS. YOU LET SOMEBODY GET TOO CLOSE, YOU START TO MISS THINGS. JUST LOOK AT DEION AND JAY.
LIV: WHAT ABOUT DEION AND JAY? BETH: WHEN YOU GHOSTED, DEION CALLED ME. JAY'S THE KILLER.
KYM: I GOTTA END THIS.
BETH: OKAY, NAME ONE HORROR MOVIE THAT ENDS WITH THE KIDS GOING TO THE COPS AND THE COPS CATCHING THE KILLER.
KYM: YOU AIN'T BEEN LISTENING, BETH. WE'RE NOT IN A HORROR MOVIE RIGHT NOW. THIS IS A DETECTIVE STORY, AND WE JUST CRACKED THE CASE.
BETH: WHAT IF DEION'S WRONG?
KYM: OKAY, LET'S REVIEW THE EVIDENCE. DEION SAID HE SAW A MASK IN JAY'S CAR EARLIER, THEN DEION CALLED YOU AND SAID THAT JAY WAS ON HIS WAY TO THE HOSPITAL. NOW WE AT THE HOSPITAL AND GHOSTFACE IS OVER HERE ATTACKING FOOLS. WHAT MORE PROOF DO YOU NEED?
BETH: STILL, GOING TO THE COPS SEEMS SO DRASTIC.
KYM: WELL, DRASTIC TIMES CALLS FOR BITCHES TO GROW A PAIR.
BETH: YEAH, BUT, KYM, SNITCHES DIE, REMEMBER?
KYM: EVERYBODY'S DYING ALREADY.
BETH: OKAY, FINE. GO AHEAD.
KYM: NO. I NEED A WHITE GIRL NEXT TO ME. ADDS CREDIBILITY. EXCUSE ME, OFFICERS. I'M COMPLETELY UNARMED.
BETH: WE KNOW WHO'S BEHIND THAT MASK. HIS NAME IS JAY ELLIOT.
JAY: HELLO?
BETH : HELLO, JAY.
JAY: NEW PHONE. WHO'S THIS?
BETH: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO IT IS. YOU MADE A BIG MESS TONIGHT. MAYBE I CAN HELP YOU CLEAN IT UP.
JAY: MAN, WHY YOU PLAYING?
BETH: YOU'VE TAKEN SOME UNDESERVED CREDIT. I CAN'T HAVE THAT. CHARADE COMES TO AN END TONIGHT.
KYM: LONG AS I'VE KNOWN THAT BOY HIS DREAM HAS BEEN TO PLAY COLLEGE BALL. IT'D BE A SHAME TO SEE HIM THROW IT ALL AWAY WHEN IT'S SO CLOSE.
BETH: THAT'S THE PROBLEM WITH DREAMS, THEY'RE FLEETING.
KYM: USED TO BE YOU'D ASK ME WHAT MY DREAM WAS, I'D SAY IS TO HELP PEOPLE. BUT WITH EVERYTHING WE'RE GOING THROUGH, THE ONLY THING I WANT IS TO LIVE.
BETH: LET'S FACE IT, KYM, ME AND YOU, WE'RE NOT FINAL GIRLS.
KYM: THE HELL IS A FINAL GIRL?
BETH: THE GIRL IN ALL THOSE SLASHER MOVIES YOU'VE BEEN WATCHING FOR RESEARCH THAT MAKES IT TO THE END, SURVIVES, SAVES HER FRIENDS. YOU SAVE ANYBODY LATELY? YEAH, ME EITHER.
KYM: THEN WE'LL SAVE OURSELVES. WE'LL STICK TOGETHER AND WATCH EACH OTHER'S BACKS TONIGHT. WE'RE GOING TO DEION'S GAME. STADIUM FULL OF PEOPLE, COPS ALL UP IN IT. JAY'D BE A FOOL TO SHOW HIS FACE.
BETH: IT'S NOT HIS FACE THAT I'M SCARED OF. IT'S THAT MASK.
KYM: WHAT'S UP WITH THIS LINE? IT'S LIKE THE NEW YEEZYS DROPPING.
BETH: WE'RE THE ONES WHO PUT THE COPS ON HIGH ALERT, REMEMBER?
KYM: WHILE WE WAIT, SOMETHING YOU SAID EARLIER HAS BEEN BOTHERING ME. WHY DON'T YOU THINK EITHER OF US HAS WHAT IT TAKES TO BE THE LAST WOMAN STANDING?
BETH: IT'S FINAL GIRL.
KYM: TO YOU, BUT PERSONALLY, I FIND THAT LABEL SEXIST AND REGRESSIVE.
BETH: WHATEVER YOU WANNA CALL HER, IN HORROR, SHE'S SHE'S EVERYTHING. THE FINAL GIRL IS THE MORAL COMPASS OF THE FILM. AND NO MATTER HOW PROGRESSIVE HORROR GETS, THE FINAL GIRL STEREOTYPE IS ALMOST AS HARD TO KILL OFF AS THE ACTUAL KILLER. AND I TOTALLY RESPECT THAT ABOUT HER.
KYM: IT'S BECAUSE THE KILLER DIDN'T TAKE HER SERIOUSLY. HE UNDERESTIMATES HER.
BETH: EVERY TIME.
BETH: HOLY CRAP. JAY'S NOT THE KILLER.
BETH: UGH. GOD, THIS IS WHAT HAVING FRIENDS IS LIKE, ISN'T IT?
BETH: OH! JUMP SCARE? REALLY? WHERE'S DEION?
LIV: HE JUST WENT AFTER JAY.
BETH: AND YOU LET HIM GO ALONE?
LIV: I NEEDED TO FIND YOU.
BETH: ME? WHAT FOR?
LIV: YOU GOT ANOTHER MESSAGE.
BETH: AND LET ME GUESS. A SNOOP LIKE YOU ALREADY KNOWS WHAT IT SAYS.
LIV: GHOSTFACE WANTS US TO GO TO THE HIGH SCHOOL.
BETH: COOL. NO WAY IN HELL I'M DOING THAT.
LIV: OR DEION DIES.
LIV: ANY LUCK WITH KYM?
BETH: HER PHONE'S OFF AND I THINK SHE JUST STOLE MY CAR.
LIV: MAYBE SHE'S ALREADY HERE.
BETH: WHAT? YOU THINK KYM'S GHOSTFACE? THAT'S CRAZY, LIV.
LIV: IS IT? KYM'S KNOWN DEION THE LONGEST, RIGHT? KNEW HIS HISTORY, KNEW MARCUS. IF GHOSTFACE HAS A PROBLEM WITH HYPOCRITES, KYM'S THE MOST SANCTIMONIOUS OF US ALL.
BETH: I DID SEE HER AND MANNY GET INTO A HUGE FIGHT, BUT I NEVER THOUGHT ANYTHING OF IT 'CAUSE THEY WERE ALWAYS BICKERING ANYWAY.
LIV: MAYBE THE KILLER DIDN'T WANT YOU TO THINK ABOUT IT. WHOEVER THIS IS HAS EVADED DETECTION AT EVERY TURN. KIND OF LIKE KYM HAS SOMEHOW AVOIDED ANY OUNCE OF SUSPICION.
BETH: HUH. I NEVER WOULD HAVE PEGGED KYM FOR THE NORMAN BATES TYPE.
LIV: YOU NEVER KNOW WHO SOMEONE REALLY IS ON THE INSIDE. I ALSO DON'T KNOW WHY GHOSTFACE BROUGHT US HERE IF WE CAN'T GET IN.
BETH: CLASSIC ORIGIN STORY. IT ENDS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN. KIND OF CLICHÉ, BUT THIS PLACE IS TOTALLY OUR CRYSTAL LAKE.
BETH: NO SIGN OF THE KILLER.
LIV: YET. I DOUBT THAT WINDOW WAS LEFT OPEN BY ACCIDENT.
BETH: NO OFFENSE, BUT I DON'T THINK PATRIOTISM IS GONNA STOP GHOSTFACE.
LIV: YOU'RE THE HORROR ENCYCLOPEDIA. HOW'S THE KILLER GONNA FINISH US OFF?
BETH: HARD TO SAY. TOMMY JENKINS AND THAT KID FROM KYM'S BLOCK GOT THEIR THROATS CUT, AVERY CRATERED, SHANE OD'D, AND MANNY GOT TURNED INTO A HUMAN TOSTADA.
LIV: YOU'RE FORGETTING ABOUT AMIR.
BETH: I'LL NEVER FORGET AMIR.
LIV: SORRY, BETH. I'M JUST TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS.
BETH: I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW ME TELLING YOU THAT THE ONE PERSON WHO EVER LIKED ME FOR WHO I AM GOT RUN THROUGH WITH A BONE SAW IS GONNA HELP.
LIV: WELL, IT DOES. THANKS, BETH.
BETH: WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?
LIV: IT'S JUST MY DAD. KEEPING TABS ON ME, EVEN FROM HIS HOSPITAL BED.
BETH: TTYL, DAD. ABOUT TO GET ATTACKED BY A SERIAL KILLER.
DEION: WHAT HAPPENED? IS THAT BLOOD?
LIV: DON'T WORRY. IT'S NOT MINE.
DEION: THEN WHOSE IS IT?
BETH: MINE. YOUR PSYCHO GIRLFRIEND BRAINED ME WHILE MY BACK WAS TURNED.
LIV: BECAUSE SHE'S THE OTHER GHOSTFACE. PLEASE, DEION, YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME.
DEION: I WANT TO. THAT'S THE PROBLEM. SO LET'S JUST TALK ABOUT THIS, ALL RIGHT? LIV: BETH KNEW AMIR WAS STABBED WITH A BONE SAW. HOW ELSE COULD SHE HAVE KNOWN THAT IF SHE WASN'T THERE, IF SHE WASN'T THE ONE WHO DID IT?
BETH: I WAS THERE, YOU BITCH. AMIR DIED IN MY HOUSE. AND AFTER DEION GOT HAULED OFF BY THE COPS BECAUSE OF YOU, I HAD TO SIT THERE ALL NIGHT LISTENING TO EVERY GRISLY DETAIL ABOUT HOW THE ONE PERSON WHO CARED ABOUT ME GOT MURDERED, DETAILS YOU SHOULDN'T KNOW.
LIV: I READ THE POLICE REPORT, OKAY? IT'S A PERFECTLY LOGICAL EXPLANATION.
BETH: YEAH, WELL, SO IS MINE. GUESS THAT PUTS THE BALL IN YOUR COURT, SPORT.
DEION: HOW ABOUT WE JUST CALL THE COPS, ALL RIGHT? LET THEM GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS.
BETH: [GUNSHOT.] I CAN'T LET YOU DO THAT, DEION. OR SHOULD I SAY MARCUS?
DEION: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US?
BETH: YOU MEAN BESIDES EXPOSING YOU ALL AS TOTAL HYPOCRITES? YOU'RE RIGHT. THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU, D'MARCUS. IT'S ABOUT HER. IT'S LIKE I SAID FROM DAY ONE. YOU ARE THE FINAL GIRL.
LIV: STAY AWAY FROM US.
BETH: UM, THIS IS A GUN, YOU IDIOT. JAY'S GUN, TO BE SPECIFIC. LUCKY I GOT TO IT BEFORE THE COPS DID. DROP THAT THING BEFORE I PUT ANOTHER BULLET IN HIS HEAD.
DEION: LIV, RUN.
BETH: SOLID ADVICE FROM YOUR SOON-TO-BE-EX-BOYFRIEND. A HORROR FLICK SHOULD NEVER END WITHOUT AN EPIC CHASE.
LIV: [RUNS.]
BETH: THAT'S THE SPIRIT.
BETH: GOD.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HARD IT IS TO SEE IN THIS DAMN THING. OH, THIS IS GONNA BE FUN.
LIV: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? BETH: BECAUSE I WAS BORN BAD. UNLIKE YOU AND YOUR LITTLE DEADFAST BESTIES, I DON'T LIE TO MYSELF ABOUT IT.
LIV: THEN WHY HAVE YOU BEEN WEARING A MASK?
BETH: THE DIFFERENCE IS WHEN I TAKE MINE OFF, NOTHING CHANGES. I ALWAYS KNEW I WAS A SOCIOPATH. I MEAN, WHY DO YOU THINK I LOVE HORROR MOVIES SO MUCH? I WATCHED EVERY SINGLE ONE I COULD GET MY HANDS ON UNTIL I REALIZED IT JUST WASN'T QUITE ENOUGH. WHY SHOULD MICHAEL MYERS GET TO HAVE ALL THE FUN WHEN I COULD BE A BETTER MONSTER? BECAUSE I'M NOT JUST SOME ACTOR BEHIND A MASK. THIS IS WHO I REALLY AM ON THE INSIDE. COME ON. THAT WAS A KILLER MONOLOGUE. LITERALLY.
BETH: NO WONDER JASON NEVER RUNS AFTER ALL THOSE STUPID COUNSELORS. THIS IS FREAKING EXHAUSTING.
LIV: YOU CAN STOP THIS. JAY'S DEAD.
BETH: NOT WHEN I'M SO CLOSE TO FINISHING WHAT I STARTED.
LIV: THIS WAS YOUR IDEA?
BETH: LIKE I SAID, ALWAYS KNEW I WAS A SOCIOPATH. I WAS A WANNABE KILLER IN SEARCH OF AN ORIGIN STORY UNTIL ONE NIGHT, IT WALKED RIGHT THROUGH MY DOOR. THE MOMENT JAY SAT IN MY CHAIR, I COULD JUST TELL WE WERE KINDRED SPIRITS. HE ASKED ME TO DO HIS DEMONS JUSTICE. AND SO, EVERY TIME HE'D COME IN, MY NEEDLE WOULD GO DEEPER AND SO WOULD HIS DARKNESS. TILL ONE NIGHT, HE TELLS ME ABOUT DEION AND ABOUT HOW MUCH HE HATED DEION FOR ABANDONING THE REAL ONE AND STEALING HIS IDENTITY. ABOUT THE LIE DEION HAD BEEN LIVING EVER SINCE. JAY WANTED REVENGE, AND I REALIZED THIS WAS FATE. I MEAN, IT WAS PERFECT. EVEN THE MASK WAS PERFECT. ALL I HAD TO DO WAS GIVE JAY THE TINIEST LITTLE PUSH. MANIPULATE HIM INTO COMMITTING MURDER, AND IT WAS ON. GETTING DETENTION WITH YOU GUYS, THAT WAS JUST THE ICING ON THE CAKE BECAUSE I GOT TO EXORCISE MY DEMONS, TOO. AND THEN WHEN I HAD TO COVER MY ASS AROUND YOU DEADFAST LOSERS, JAY WOULD WEAR THE COSTUME. BUT BESIDES THAT, I GOT TO BE WHAT I WAS BORN TO BE. AND THAT MOMENT WITH AMIR? GOD, IT WAS EVERYTHING.
LIV: HE TRUSTED YOU.
BETH: HE BROKE THE RULES. AND I KNEW THAT IF I KILLED HIM, I COULD KILL ANYBODY. I MEAN, I MIGHT HAVE EVEN CARED ABOUT HIM. THAT'S WHY I LET HIM SEE ME FOR WHO I'M TRULY WAS.
LIV: A COLD-BLOODED MURDERER?
BETH: HEY, I WARNED AMIR TO STAY AWAY FROM ME. SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T WANNA BE HELPED.
LIV: WERE YOU HELPING JAY, TOO?
BETH: KILLING JAY WAS ALWAYS PART OF THE PLAN. BUT, YOU KNOW, KYM JUST FORCED MY HAND BY GOING TO THE COPS, AND I KNEW THAT IF THEY GOT TO HIM BEFORE I DID, I'D BE SCREWED, SO I HAD TO PUT HIM DOWN. I MEAN, WHAT? I HAD TO PIN ALL THESE MURDERS ON SOMEBODY, RIGHT?
LIV: THEY'LL NEVER BELIEVE YOU.
BETH: UM, RIGHT. WHO DO YOU THINK THE COPS ARE GONNA BELIEVE? A TATTED-UP THUG LIKE JAY OR A PRETTY LITTLE WHITE GIRL LIKE ME?
LIV: I'LL TELL THEM THE TRUTH.
BETH: YOU'LL BE DEAD.
LIV: YOU'RE FORGETTING ABOUT KYM.
BETH: TRUST ME, I'M NOT. I ACTUALLY THINK SHE'S KIND OF COOL, BUT -AT THE END OF THE DAY, SHE'S ALL TALK. DID YOU KNOW THAT I CALLED HER AND I GAVE HER A CHANCE TO GET OUT? AND SHE ABANDONED YOU GUYS WITHOUT THINKING TWICE. KYM MIGHT BE THE BIGGEST HYPOCRITE OF THEM ALL. BUT SCREW EVERYBODY ELSE. THIS IS ABOUT ME AND YOU.
LIV: WAIT, WAIT! IF I'M YOUR FINAL GIRL, THAT MEANS I SURVIVE, RIGHT?
BETH: SEE, I USED TO THINK THAT. BUT THEN I REALIZED HORROR ISN'T ABOUT THE VICTIMS. I MEAN, WHY DO YOU THINK THE FRANCHISES LAST SO LONG? THE BODY DROPS CHANGE, BUT THE KILLER ALWAYS COMES BACK FOR MORE. THE KILLER'S THE REAL HERO OF THE STORY.
LIV: BETH, PLEASE.
BETH: WHAT? FORGET YOUR LINE? DON'T WORRY, THIS IS THE PART WHERE YOU SCREAM.
KYM: STAND BACK, Y'ALL. I’M ABOUT TO PUT A BULLET IN BETH'S JACKED-UP BRAINPAN.
LIV: SHE SAID YOU BAILED ON US.
KYM: DEFINITELY COULD'VE. GHOSTFACE OFFERED ME THE CHANCE TO GET OUT. AND THAT'S WHEN I PUT IT ALL TOGETHER. BETH WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW I WAS SHOOK ENOUGH TO BOUNCE. BUT THAT AIN'T HOW A FINAL GIRL ROLLS. I CAME BACK FOR Y'ALL INSTEAD. I HEARD THAT FIRE ALARM GOING OFF, AND I FOUND THIS ON THE GROUND. I KNEW THERE WAS SOME REALNESS GOING DOWN.
DEION: OKAY, WELL, THERE AIN'T NO NEED FOR IT NO MORE. YOU CAN DROP THAT THING.
KYM: NUH-UH. IT DON'T MATTER IF IT'S A CLASSIC HORROR, A PREQUEL, A SEQUEL, A PRE-BOOT, OR A REBOOT, EVERYBODY KNOWS THE KILLER COMES BACK FOR ONE LAST SCARE.
BETH: [SCREAMS.] IT WAS YOU THE WHOLE TIME. GUESS YOU'RE RIGHT. WE ARE PARTNERS.
KYM: BOOM. FINAL GIRL, Y'ALL.
BETH: VIP TREATMENT. MUST BE NICE. TAKES THEM AN HOUR TO WAND MY FACE.
HAWKINS: YOU EVER THINK ABOUT, LIKE, NOT STICKING THAT CRAP IN IT, BETH?
BETH: WOULD YOU THINK I'M PRETTY THEN?
HAWKINS: TSK, I I DON'T KNOW. YOU STILL FREAKY AS HELL. I MEAN, BUT MAYBE WE CAN TALK ABOUT IT.
DEION: YOU WANNA CUT? I MEAN, IT'S COOL. YOU CAN TAKE MY SPOT.
BETH: TELLING ME TO CUT IS A BAD IDEA. LIKE, REALLY BAD.
BETH: IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
AMIR: UM NO. NONE OF THEM ARE, ACTUALLY.
BETH: SHOCKER.
AMIR: OKAY, SO THE BREAKFAST CLUB IS A COMEDY FROM A HUNDRED YEARS AGO ABOUT A GROUP OF WHITE KIDS FROM DIFFERENT CLIQUES WHO GET THROWN IN DETENTION TOGETHER. EIGHTY-NINE PERCENT ON ROTTEN TOMATOES.
BETH: IT'S BETTER THAN IT SOUNDS. MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE FILM.
AMIR: REALLY?
BETH: NO, DORK. I'M A HORROR GIRL. BUT FITCH IS RIGHT, THE SIX OF US PRETTY MUCH COVER THE ENTIRE NAUSEATING RANGE OF HIGH SCHOOL STEREOTYPES.
AMIR: IT SAYS THERE'S ONLY FIVE CHARACTERS IN THE MOVIE. SIX WORKS. IT'S BETTER, ACTUALLY.
MANNY: LET ME GUESS. NO GAYS?
BETH: THE JOCK, PRINCESS, THE GEEK, THE REBEL.
KYM: UNH-UNH, DON'T YOU DARE TRY STUFFING ME IN ONE OF YOUR BOXES.
AMIR: WHAT ABOUT YOU?
KYM: THAT'S EASY. SHE THE BASKET CASE. AND CAN YOU PUT THAT THING OUT? MANNY HAS ASTHMA.
BETH: WHATEVER.
AMIR: IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
BETH: HEY, POINTS FOR THE CALLBACK.
BETH: I HATE PARTIES. ALWAYS FULL OF PEOPLE.
SHANE: YEAH, WELL, I GOT A GOOD FEELING YOU'RE GONNA LIKE THIS ONE. HOW ABOUT I CONVINCE YOU IN PRIVATE?
BETH: FINE. YOU'RE ALL FREE TO GO. JUST BE BACK BY 4:00 SO WE DON'T HAVE TO DO THIS AGAIN TOMORROW, OKAY? MANNY: AND THEY SAY ROMANCE IS DEAD.
KYM: IF IT AIN'T, THESE TWO WEIRDOS ABOUT TO KILL IT.
DEION: DID Y'ALL SEE IT? SOMEBODY JUST JUMPED ME. SOME KIND OF GHOSTFACE.
BETH: THOUGHT I WAS THE FREAK.
DEION: I'M BEING SERIOUS. I CAN PROVE IT.
DEION: HE MUST'VE ERASED THE MESSAGES TO MAKE ME SEEM CRAZY.
BETH: THEN HE'S DOING A HELL OF A JOB.
SHANE: SO, YOU SATISFIED?
BETH: WITH THE PARTY? YES. WITH YOU, NOT YET.
DEION: Y'ALL IN DANGER. SOMEBODY'S THREATENING TO KILL ONE OF Y'ALL.
BETH: LET ME GUESS: GHOSTFACE.
BETH: HELLO?
AVERY: WHERE YOU GOING, BETH? I LIKE YOUR PIERCINGS. I HAVE SOMETHING ELSE YOU CAN STICK IN YOUR FACE.
BETH: OH, YEAH? DEPENDS ON WHO'S DOING THE STICKING.
AVERY: WHO DO YOU WANT ME TO BE?
BETH: WELL, DEFINITELY NOT AVERY COLLINS WHO HOOKED UP WITH ME AT THAT BLACKOUT KEGGER FRESHMAN YEAR, THEN NEVER CALLED ME AGAIN, AND WHOSE NUMBER I STILL HAVE IN MY PHONE FOR SOME REASON.
AMIR: IS HE DEAD? ASKING FOR REAL THIS TIME.
BETH: I DON'T KNOW. IT'S SO DIFFERENT THAN THE MOVIES.
KYM SO SOMEBODY HAS IT OUT FOR DEION. WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH THE REST OF US? AND WHY ARE WE IN THIS JANKY TATTOO SHOP?
BETH: BECAUSE I WORK HERE. CAN'T ANSWER THE OTHER QUESTION, THOUGH.
ALL: [CELL PHONES CHIMING,
AMIR: "SHOW ME YOUR INSIDES"? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
BETH: IT MEANS WE'RE IN A HORROR MOVIE.
KYM: THAT'S YOUR LIFE, EDWARD SCISSORHANDS. NOT OURS.
BETH: OKAY, THAT'S NOT EVEN A HORROR MOVIE. AND IT'S YOUR LIFE NOW, TOO. DON'T YOU GUYS GET IT? WE'RE BEING HUNTED BY A KILLER HERE. KILLERS HAVE CODES AND HORROR HAS RULES.
DEION: WAIT, I DIDN'T KNOW THAT HORROR HAD A PLAYBOOK.
BETH: WELL, IT DOES, AND IT PLAYS BY IT, MEANING I'VE GOT SOME BAD NEWS, YOU GUYS. WE'RE NOT THE TYPE OF CHARACTERS TO MAKE IT TO THE END.
LIV: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
BETH: OKAY. RELAX, PRINCESS. YOU HAVE "FINAL GIRL" POTENTIAL. THE REST OF US, GOTH, GEEK, GAY, NOT A CHANCE. WE'RE USUALLY THE FIRST BODY THAT DROPS.
DEION: OKAY, WELL, WHAT ABOUT ME AND KYM?
BETH: DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, BUT YOU GUYS ARE BLACK.
KYM: GIRL.
BETH: IN HORROR, THAT'S PRETTY MUCH AN INSTA-KILL.
AMIR: BUT AVERY WAS ONE OF THE WHITEST PEOPLE I'VE EVER SEEN. I MEAN, HE PRACTICALLY GLOWED IN THE DARK, SO WHY DID HE DIE?
DEION: BECAUSE HE WASN'T WHO HE SAID HE WAS. ON THE INSIDE.
LIV: DEION'S RIGHT. AVERY PRETENDED TO BE A NICE GUY, BUT DEEP DOWN, HE WAS A TOTAL RACIST.
KYM: DOES THAT JIVE WITH YOUR FREAKY RULES?
BETH: LET'S HOPE NOT. BECAUSE IF THAT'S THE KILLER'S GAME, WE'RE NOT THE BREAKFAST CLUB. WE'RE THE DEADFAST CLUB. AND I'M PRETTY SURE WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE
BETH: AS MUCH AS I'D LOVE TO SIT AROUND HERE AND MOURN THE DEARLY DEPARTED, CAN WE PLEASE GET BACK TO THE ISSUE AT HAND HERE? KYM ALMOST GOT KILLED LAST NIGHT.
DEION: SO WE KNOW THAT THE KILLER'S AFTER US, BUT WHY WOULD HE KILL LT? KYM: HE WAS TRYING TO KILL ME. BUT HE DID SAY SOMETHING ABOUT LATAVIOUS BEING A HYPOCRITE, WHICH IS TRUE. BUT LT WAS ALSO FINE. I DID NOT MIND HIM HOLLERING AT ME.
BETH: I KEEP TELLING YOU GUYS, KILLERS HAVE CODES.
MANNY: CODE OR NO CODE, I SHOULD'VE GOTTEN THERE SOONER.
KYM: AND DO WHAT? HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK? I LOVE YOU, MANNY, BUT CONFLICT ISN'T YOUR STRONG SUIT.
DEION: MAYBE BETH'S RIGHT. BECAUSE IF THE KILLER WENT AFTER KYM, THEN HE'S KEEPING GOOD ON HIS WORD.
MANNY: I THINK WE SHOULD CALL THE COPS.
BETH: NO, NO. IN HORROR MOVIES, THE COPS ARE TOTALLY USELESS. THEY DON'T BELIEVE THE VICTIMS UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE.
KYM: WORKS THAT WAY IN REAL LIFE, TOO. BY THE TIME FIVE-0 GOT THERE LAST NIGHT, THEY ALREADY HAD THEIR STORY STRAIGHT. APPARENTLY, DOPE DEALERS LIKE MASKS JUST AS MUCH AS PSYCHOPATHS DO.
DEION: BETH, IF WE'RE TRAPPED IN A HORROR MOVIE HOW DO WE SURVIVE?
KYM: BY NOT LISTENING TO HER. I DID THE RESEARCH, Y'ALL, AND THE TYPE OF HORROR MOVIES THAT BETH'S TALKING ABOUT ARE WHITE PEOPLE IN WHITE-PEOPLE PLACES MAKING DUMB WHITE-PEOPLE MISTAKES.
BETH: DUH. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HORROR IS.
KYM: NUH-UH. THERE ARE HORROR MOVIES WITH BLACK FOLKS, TOO.
BETH: OH, REALLY? NAME ONE. BESIDES GET OUT.
KYM: I DON'T HAVE TO BECAUSE WE'RE MAKING OUR OWN RULES JUST LIKE JORDAN PEELE.
AMIR: NO SPOILERS. I HAVEN'T SEEN IT YET.
KYM: IT AIN'T A SPOILER WHEN IT'S THE TITLE. CHRIS GETS OUT. HE SURVIVED BY GOING STRAIGHT AT THE KILLERS, AND I SAY WE DO THE SAME.
BETH: CAN'T BELIEVE I'M SAYING THIS, BUT I THINK KYM'S RIGHT. THINK ABOUT IT. IN MOST HORROR MOVIES, NOBODY ACTUALLY GOES AFTER THE KILLER UNTIL ALMOST EVERYBODY'S DEAD. IF WE DO THAT NOW, WE FLIP THE SCRIPT.
BETH: DO YOU GUYS WANNA FLIP A COIN AND SEE WHO'S GONNA CALL THE PRINCESS AND LET HER KNOW? AS LONG AS BOTH SIDES SAY "NOT ME.
FITCH: THANK YOU, WEAVER HIGH AV CLUB, FOR THAT EMOTIONAL PRESENTATION. AVERY LEFT THIS WORLD TOO SOON, BUT HE'S IN A BETTER PLACE.
BETH: ARE YOU CRYING?
AMIR: NO. NOT FOR AVERY. THIS SONG JUST ALWAYS GETS ME.
KYM: I'M PRETTY SURE I JUST FIGURED OUT WHO THE KILLER IS. WHO WAS IN DETENTION THAT GAVE US THE INVITATION? WHO'S THE ONE THAT GAVE US THE FREAKY COSTUMES? WHO WAS THE ONE AT THE DOOR COLLECTING ALL THAT CASH? SHANE.
AMIR: SO SHANE IS FADE?
KYM: AND FADE IS GHOSTFACE.
MANNY: BUT WHY WOULD SHANE KILL AVERY?
BETH: AVERY USED TO BUY FROM SHANE ALL THE TIME. MAYBE A DEAL WENT BAD?
BETH: WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? TAKE IT.
AMIR: I'VE NEVER STOLEN FROM MY PARENTS BEFORE.
BETH: WE'RE NOT STEALING, OKAY? WE'RE BORROWING. THE MONEY'S JUST BAIT.
AMIR: STILL, A THOUSAND BUCKS. THAT'S A LOT OF CASH. COULDN'T WE TAKE LESS? BETH: NO, LESS WON'T WORK. WE NEED SHANE TO BELIEVE THIS IS A LEGIT DEAL.
AMIR: OKAY. BUT WHEN THIS IS DONE, ALL THE MONEY GOES BACK, RIGHT? BETH: EVERY LAST DOLLAR.
BETH: [HOLDING A GUN.] BANG, YOU'RE DEAD.
AMIR: ARE YOU CRAZY? PUT THAT BACK!
BETH: WE'RE ABOUT TO CONFRONT A PSYCHO KILLER. WE NEED TO BRING THIS.
AMIR: NO, NO. THE GUN STAYS, OKAY? WE CAN TAKE THE MONEY. BUT MY PARENTS NEED THAT TO PROTECT THEMSELVES AND THE SHOP. PUT IT BACK.
BETH: YOU KNOW, EVEN LUKE SKYWALKER DIPPED HIS TOE INTO THE DARK SIDE ONCE.
AMIR: WAIT, YOU LIKE STAR WARS, TOO? [MIMICS DARTH VADER.] THE FORCE IS STRONG WITH THIS ONE.
BETH: WAY TO RUIN THE MOMENT, NERD.
BETH: THAT DEFORMED ELEPHANT GONNA ACTUALLY WORK? IT BETTER.
MANNY: IT WILL.
KYM: YOU GOT THE CASH?
BETH: RIGHT HERE. AMIR'S ON LOOKOUT. I TOLD HIM TO KILL THE LIGHTS THE SECOND SHANE COMES IN.
MANNY: I'M SURPRISED HE LET YOU OUT OF SIGHT.
BETH: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
MANNY: HE'S INTO YOU. IT'S OBVIOUS.
BETH: I WOULD DESTROY THAT KID.
SHANE: BETH, I THOUGHT WE HAD A DEAL.
BETH: THAT WAS THE POINT. I LIED.
SHANE: WHAT? THAT'S MESSED UP. I NEED THAT MONEY.
MANNY: TO THROW ANOTHER MURDER PARTY?
SHANE: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? KYM: NO. YOU DON'T GET TO ASK THE QUESTIONS, PUSHER MAN. I DO. NOW, I WANNA KNOW WHY YOU TRIED TO KILL ME LAST NIGHT.
SHANE: IF I WANTED TO KILL YOU, YOU'D BE DEAD. I STILL DON'T SEE WHERE YOU'RE GOING WITH THIS.
KYM: HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS?
SHANE: YEAH SO WHAT? Y'ALL WERE AT THE PARTY. WE ALL HAVE ONE.
KYM: YEAH, BECAUSE YOU GAVE THEM TO US. SO YOU COULD HIDE YOUR FACE WHILE YOU KILLED AVERY.
SHANE: WAIT, WAIT, YOU THINK I HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THAT? IT WAS YOUR PARTY, WASN'T IT? YEAH, YEAH, OKAY, I'M MR.FADE, BUT I AIN'T NO KILLER. AVERY'S DEATH WAS AN ACCIDENT, RIGHT?
BETH: WRONG.
KYM: WHAT ABOUT THE COSTUMES? WHY ARE YOU MESSING WITH DEION LIKE THAT?
SHANE: MESSING WITH DEION? THEY'RE JUST COSTUMES. GOES WITH THE WHOLE MR. FADE ANONYMITY THING, YOU FEEL ME?
KYM: WHERE'D YOU GET THEM?
SHANE: I GOT HOOKUPS EVERYWHERE. ONE OF MY BOYS GOT THEM FOR ME. DON'T KNOW WHICH ONE. ALL I KNOW IS THEY'RE TWO BUCKS EACH.
BETH: DO YOU REALLY EXPECT US TO BELIEVE THAT?
SHANE: YEAH, I DO, BECAUSE I'M NOT A LYING BITCH LIKE YOU, BETH. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO LURED ME IN HERE, TIED ME UP. FOR ALL I KNOW, IT WAS ONE OF YOU THAT SENT ME THAT CREEPY-ASS TEXT, TOO.
KYM: WAIT, WHAT TEXT?
SHANE: CHECK MY PHONE. I THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE, BUT IF THERE'S A KILLER OUT THERE, I GUESS HE'S AFTER ME, TOO.
AMIR: SO IF SHANE ISN'T GHOSTFACE...
BETH: THEN WHO THE HELL IS?
GHOSTFACE: ATTENTION, WEAVER HIGH STUDENTS. SLASH IS NOW IN SESSION, AND IT'S TIME FOR ONE OF YOU TO DIE.
KYM: I DON'T PLAN ON BEING HERE WHEN HIS ASS FINALLY SHOWS UP.
BETH: ROOKIE MISTAKE. WHEN THE KILLER'S IN YOUR MIDST, THE LAST THING YOU DO IS HEAD OFF BY YOURSELF. THAT'S ALMOST AS STUPID AS SAYING, "I'LL BE RIGHT BACK." EITHER WAY, YOU'RE DEAD MEAT.
KYM: FOR THE LAST TIME, CRUELLA, I'M NOT IN ONE OF YOUR DAMN HORROR MOVIES. OKAY?
AMIR: I'M NOT ACTUALLY GONNA DIE, RIGHT? BECAUSE MY PARENTS WILL KILL ME.
BETH: NO. RELAX. YOU MADE THE RIGHT CALL, OKAY? NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS WAIT UNTIL WE HEAR KYM AND MANNY SCREAM. THEN WE BOUNCE.
AMIR: WHY WHY WOULD THEY SCREAM? BETH: PROBABLY BECAUSE GHOSTFACE STUCK A KNIFE IN THEM.
AMIR: THAT'S MESSED UP.
SHANE: WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT, AMIR. SHE IS MESSED UP. WHICH IS WHY YOU SHOULD FOLLOW MY LEAD OUT THE DOOR.
BETH: TRUST ME, YOU DO NOT WANNA GO OUT THERE ALONE.
AMIR: OKAY, I KNOW YOU'RE THE EXPERT, BUT WHY ARE WE IN HERE, EXACTLY?
BETH: BECAUSE STORAGE CLOSETS ARE A CLASSIC HORROR HIDING PLACE.
AMIR: DOES THAT MEAN WE'RE SAFE?
BETH: 80-20. ALMOST ALWAYS WORKS.
AMIR: AND WHEN IT DOESN'T?
BETH: IT GOES HORRIBLY WRONG.
BETH: SSH.
AMIR: THAT WAS CLO—
BETH: SHH, SHH! OKAY, NOW WE'RE SAFE.
AMIR: HOW DID YOU KNOW HE WAS GONNA COME BACK?
BETH: 'CAUSE THE KILLER ALWAYS COMES BACK. I DON'T MAKE THE RULES, DONUT BOY. I JUST PLAY BY THEM.
AMIR: CAN WE GET OUT OF HERE, PLEASE?
BETH: SURE. I MEAN, IF THAT'S WHAT YOU REALLY WANT.
AMIR: I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT. ALL I KNOW IS YOU SMELL LIKE SKITTLES AND SMOKE. IT'S INTOXICATING.
BETH: WELL, THEN WHY DON'T YOU TASTE THE RAINBOW? KISS ME, AMIR. I DARE YOU.
AMIR: SHANE WAS RIGHT. YOU ARE CRAZY. [THUDS.]
BETH: GREAT. NOW WE GOTTA GO OR WE GET GUTTED.
KYM: WHERE'S BETH?
AMIR: I'M NOT SURE. WE GOT SEPARATED.
KYM: HOW CONVENIENT. WHEN THE KILLER'S COMING FOR MY ASS, YOU AND MORTICIA MAKE A RUN FOR IT.
BETH: I'M HERE. TOTALLY IN ONE PIECE, SO YOU CAN QUIT WORRYING ABOUT ME NOW. OH, AND BY THE WAY, I TAKE MORTICIA ADDAMS AS A COMPLIMENT, SO, THANKS.
SHANE: LET'S GO. I'LL WALK YOU HOME.
BETH: THINK I'M GONNA ROLL WITH THE GEEK. AT LEAST I KNOW HE'S A PUSSY.
BETH: YOUR PARENTS REALLY KNOW THEIR STUFF, HUH?
AMIR: YEAH, JELLY'S THEIR SPECIALTY. THAT'LL BE A BUCK.
BETH: MM. PUT IT ON MY TAB. I WASN'T, UH I WASN'T TALKING ABOUT THE DONUT, FYI. I MEAN, LOOK AT YOU. THEY MUST'VE RAISED YOU RIGHT.
AMIR: I NEVER REALLY HAD ANOTHER OPTION.
BETH: YOU DID TONIGHT, IN THAT CLOSET.
AMIR: ACTUALLY, I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THAT.
BETH: WHAT, HAVING REGRETS?
AMIR: MY ONLY REGRET IS I ALMOST DID SOMETHING I WOULD HAVE REGRETTED.
BETH: THAT'S A REALLY CONFUSING SENTENCE.
AMIR: I KNOW. IT'S ALL VERY CONFUSING.
BETH: DOESN'T HAVE TO BE.
AMIR: YOU'RE RIGHT. MY PARENTS RAISED ME A CERTAIN WAY.BUT AT SOME POINT, I HAD TO MAKE A CHOICE. THEIR BELIEFS ARE MY BELIEFS, TOO. AND I BELIEVE I BELIEVE WE SHOULD JUST BE FRIENDS.THIS IS A BAD IDEA.
BETH: RELAX, SKYWALKER. YOU'RE NOT MY TYPE ANYWAY. I JUST THOUGHT MAYBE YOU'D WANNA GO OUT WITH A BANG.
BETH: IT'S HALLOWEEN. THE ONE DAY A YEAR YOU GET TO BE ANYTHING YOU WANNA BE, AND YOU CHOSE TO DRESS UP AS SOME MEATHEAD JOCK?
AMIR: OF COURSE NOT. MOST JOCKS TREAT ME LIKE CRAP, BUT NOT DEION. I FEEL LIKE HE HAS MY BACK.
BETH: IN MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THE ONLY PERSON PEOPLE EVER LOOK OUT FOR IS THEMSELVES.
AMIR: THAT'S SAD.
BETH: NOT AS SAD AS YOU GOING FULL-ON STALKER ON DEION.
AMIR: I'M NOT A STALKER.
BETH: WELL, THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT A STALKER WOULD SAY.
AMIR: HEY, WAIT UP. DID YOU HEAR ABOUT SHANE?
BETH: WHAT ABOUT HIM? LIV JUST TOLD ME. HE'S DEAD. WE'RE GUESSING GHOSTFACE GOT HIM.
BETH: WELL, THEN I GUESS MR. FADE GOT FADED.
AMIR: I'M SORRY. I KNOW YOU GUYS WERE ACTUALLY, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU GUYS WERE.
BETH: WHAT I HAD WITH SHANE WAS JUST SEX AND NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.
AMIR: WHATEVER IT WAS, IF YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT I DON'T.
BETH: AND WHY DO YOU EVEN CARE ANYWAYS? LAST NIGHT, I OFFERED YOU A NO-STRINGS HOOKUP, AND YOU PASSED. AND NOW YOU WANNA OFFER ME A SHOULDER TO CRY ON? COME ON, AMIR. NOBODY'S THAT NICE.
AMIR: LAST NIGHT, I TOLD YOU I WANTED TO BE FRIENDS, BETH. I MEANT THAT.
BETH: THIS IS A HORROR MOVIE, NOT A ROM-COM, SO DON'T GET ANY WEIRD IDEAS. BESIDES, YOU BARELY EVEN KNOW ME.
AMIR: NOT FOR LACK OF TRYING.
BETH: OKAY, WELL, YOU WANNA DO SOMETHING FOR ME? STOP TRYING.
KYM: UNLESS MARCUS CAME BACK AS A ZOMBIE, THERE'S NO WAY HE'S GHOSTFACE.
BETH: YEAH, BUT IF IT REALLY IS MARCUS UNDER THAT MASK, THEN DEION'S DOOMED. IN HORROR, THE KILLER OFTENTIMES TRIES TO TAKE OUT THE MAIN CHARACTER BY LURING HIM TO A PLACE OF SIGNIFICANCE ON THE NIGHT OF HIS ORIGIN.
KYM: ONLY TO BE TAKEN OUT BY THE HERO INSTEAD. I'VE SEEN THOSE MOVIES, TOO, ELVIRA. I KNOW HOW THEY WORK. AND LIKE I'VE TOLD YOU, THIS HERE'S A REBOOT. AND REBOOTS DON'T PLAY BY YOUR RULES.
BETH: BECAUSE REBOOTS SUCK.
BETH: PRINCESS HERE GOT IT IN HER HEAD YOU WERE ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING STUPID, WHICH, CLEARLY, YOU ARE.
BETH: CRAP. SORRY, I THINK I'M SHORT.
AMIR: THIS SHOULD COVER IT.
BETH: THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO STOP TRYING.
AMIR: TRYING TO DO WHAT?
BETH: COME ON, WE BOTH KNOW WHAT YOU REALLY WANT FROM ME.
AMIR: IS IT REALLY THAT HARD FOR YOU TO BELIEVE I JUST WANNA BE YOUR FRIEND? BETH: EVERYONE'S GOT AN ANGLE, AMIR, EVEN YOU.
AMIR: I DON’T LIVE MY LIFE THAT WAY, AND I THINK IT'S SAD THAT YOU DO.
BETH: WELL, MAYBE YOU SHOULD START, 'CAUSE LAST TIME I CHECKED, YOU DON'T HAVE THAT MANY FRIENDS EITHER. AT LEAST I'M MAKING A CHOICE.
BETH: THIS IS REALLY BAD, YOU GUYS.
MANNY: OBVIOUSLY. WHO EVEN DOES THAT?
KYM: I HAVE MY SUSPICIONS.
BETH: THOSE RANDOS? NO, THOSE ARE JUST GLORIFIED EXTRAS. AND THE KNIFE, WELL, IT'S A CLASSIC PLOT POINT.
KYM: FOR THE LAST TIME, REBOOT, BITCH. AND THOSE GOOD OL' BOYS ARE ABOUT TO PAY FOR WHAT THEY DID.
BETH: OKAY, REBOOT OR NOT, IT DOESN'T MATTER. MANNY, WE'RE THE SECONDARY CHARACTERS HERE, RIGHT? THE COMIC RELIEF, THE SIDEKICK.
MANNY: THE KNOW-IT-ALL?
BETH: CALL ME WHATEVER YOU WANT. NOW THAT WE'RE STRANDED, WE'RE A BUNCH OF SITTING DUCKS, AND THAT'S USUALLY WHEN EVERYTHING GOES WRONG FOR PEOPLE LIKE US.
MANNY: LIKE, HOW WRONG?
BETH: WELL, THE LONGER WE'RE STUCK OUT HERE, CUT OFF FROM THE OTHERS, THE MORE WE'LL START TO SLOWLY UNRAVEL UNTIL ONE OF US INEVITABLY GOES OFF AND DOES SOMETHING STUPID. AND THEN, WELL, I THINK WE BOTH KNOW WHAT HAPPENS THEN, RIGHT? LONG STORY SHORT ONE OF US IS GONNA DIE.
BETH: ARE YOU GUYS SERIOUSLY ARGUING ABOUT NOT GETTING DELIVERANCED?
BETH: WOW. YOU REALLY ARE DEAD TO HER.
MANNY: YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED, BUT KYM DOESN'T LIKE WHEN PEOPLE STAND UP TO HER.
BETH: SO SHE ONLY WANTS YOU AROUND WHEN YOU'RE DOING EXACTLY WHAT SHE WANTS? SOME FRIEND.
MANNY: MORE LIKE A SISTER. PUSHES MY BUTTONS LIKE NO OTHER. BUT, HEY SIBLINGS FIGHT, RIGHT?
BETH: AND SMASH EACH OTHER'S CARS? YEAH, DIDN'T SEE THAT ONE COMING.
MANNY: HURRY UP!
BETH: I'M TRYING. SORRY, THESE SHOES AREN'T MADE FOR RUNNING.
MANNY: THOSE BOOTS ARE AWFUL, BY THE WAY.
BETH: SCREW YOU.
BETH: DID YOU RUN ALL THE WAY HERE?
AMIR: FOR THE FIRST MILE. AFTER THAT, IT WAS MORE LIKE A PAINFUL JOG.
BETH: WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU DO THAT?
AMIR: BECAUSE LIV SLASHED YOUR GUYS' TIRE AND LEFT YOU—
BETH: WAIT, WAIT, HOLD UP. LIV DID THAT?
AMIR:!YEAH, BUT IT DOESN'T MATTER. ALL THAT MATTERS IS YOU'RE OKAY.
BETH: DAMN. YOU REALLY ARE THAT NICE. GUESS I WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU.
AMIR: ACTUALLY, I THINK YOU WERE RIGHT. MAYBE I DO HAVE AN ANGLE 'CAUSE I DO WANT SOMETHING FROM YOU. SOMETHING MORE THAN JUST FRIENDS.
BETH: HAVE YOU EVER EVEN KISSED A GIRL BEFORE?
AMIR: DOES IT MATTER?
BETH: NOT TO ME.
KYM; WHERE'S MANNY? I THOUGHT I THOUGHT HE WAS WITH YOU.
BETH: HE SAW THOSE REDNECKS HEADED YOUR WAY AND HE RAN OFF TO SAVE YOU.
DEION: WE GOTTA STICK TOGETHER, Y'ALL.
LIV: NOT IF IT'S ONE OF US DOING THIS.
KYM: ONE OF US? I KNOW YOU'RE NOT SUGGESTING THAT I COULD'VE KILLED MANNY.
LIV: IT'S JUST A THEORY.
BETH: YOU SEEM TO HAVE A LOT OF THEORIES LATELY, LIV. DO YOU THINK THE KILLER COULD'VE DONE SOMETHING LIKE SLASH KYM'S TIRE? BECAUSE AMIR TOLD ME YOU DID THAT.
DEION: LIV DIDN'T KNOW WHAT THE KILLER WAS PLANNING, KYM.
BETH: KNEW ENOUGH TO GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE BEFORE HOOKMAN GOT GUTTED. YOU SAID YOU COULDN'T FIND HER, RIGHT, DEION?
LIV: BECAUSE I WAS LOOKING FOR AMIR. HE DISAPPEARED.
AMIR: BECAUSE I WAS TRYING TO HELP BETH, AND KYM AND MANNY, TOO. DON'T TRY TO PIN THIS ON ME. GHOSTFACE ALMOST GOT BETH AND I WHEN WE WERE AT THE SCHOOL TO TRAP SHANE.
BETH: YEAH. AND YOU KNOW WHO WASN'T THERE THAT NIGHT? LIV.
LIV: I WAS AT HOME, OKAY? MY DAD WOULDN'T LET ME OUT OF THE HOUSE.
BETH: YOUR COP DAD. I'M GUESSING HE DOESN'T KNOW HIS BABY GIRL'S BEING STALKED BY A SERIAL KILLER, OR ELSE THE WHOLE DEPARTMENT WOULD BE UP THE KILLER'S ASS BY NOW.
DEION: THIS IS BETWEEN ME AND HIM.
AMIR: OR HER. IT COULD BE A HER, TOO, RIGHT?
BETH: TOTALLY.
AMIR: YOU THINK WE CAN TRUST THE OTHERS?
BETH: HELL, NO. DO YOU?
AMIR: I DON'T KNOW. I WANT TO. I MEAN LIKE, IF NO ONE TEXTS A NAME, WON'T THE KILLER BE PISSED? I DON'T KNOW.
BETH: I'M STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT THE KILLER'S GAME. BUT IF HE OR SHE THINKS THAT ONE OF US IS GONNA GIVE UP A NAME, MAYBE THERE'S SOMETHING TO IT.
AMIR: WELL, I PROMISE I WON'T SELL YOU OUT.
BETH: YOU'RE NEVER GONNA SURVIVE THIS THING BY LOOKING OUT FOR ME. YOU NEED TO WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
AMIR: BUT I'M INTO YOU, BETH. THOUGHT I MADE THAT CLEAR OUT IN THE BOONIES.
BETH: YOU'RE NOT THE WORST PERSON IN THE WORLD, EITHER. BUT THAT MUSHY STUFF IS A PERFECT DISTRACTION FOR A KILLER THAT'S JUST WAITING FOR US TO DROP OUR GUARD. SO MAYBE IT'S BETTER IF YOU JUST STAY AWAY UNTIL ALL THIS IS OVER.
AMIR: UH, HI. I'M LOOKING FOR BETH. OH, WOW, BETH, YOU LOOK AWESOME.
BETH: I JUST GOT OUT OF THE SHOWER. AND NORMALLY I LOOK?
AMIR: DIFFERENT. ALSO AWESOME. YOU HAVE A HEARSE IN YOUR DRIVEWAY.
BETH: YEAH. THIS IS A FUNERAL HOME, AND IT'S MY HOME, TOO.
AMIR: THAT ACTUALLY EXPLAINS A LOT.
BETH: WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
AMIR: SOMEONE GOT PICKED.
BETH: YEAH, I SAW.
AMIR: SO, I WAS THINKING WE COULD LOOK OUT FOR EACH OTHER?
BETH: DID WHAT I TELL YOU GO RIGHT THROUGH YOUR DONUT HOLE AND OUT THE OTHER SIDE? IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA.
AMIR: YOU'RE WATCHING HORROR MOVIES AT A TIME LIKE THIS?
BETH: I'M LOOKING FOR CLUES, PATTERNS. BECAUSE WE HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT'S NEXT, AMIR. FIND THE NEXT PLOT TWIST SO WE CAN STAY ONE STEP AHEAD.
AMIR: WELL, IF ANY OF THAT INVOLVES ME STAYING AWAY FROM YOU, YOU CAN FORGET IT.
BETH: LOOK I DON'T WANT ANYTHING BAD TO HAPPEN TO YOU BECAUSE OF ME. WE ALL HAVE ROLES TO PLAY IN THIS.
YOU MIGHT BE THE NICE GUY, BUT I'M THE BITCH. GOOD FOR A FEW QUIPS, MAYBE A BOOB FLASH, AND THEN I'M THE ONE THAT EVERYBODY WANTS TO SEE DIE. AND THEY CHEER WHEN IT HAPPENS, LIKE WHEN THAT WHEELCHAIR DUDE GETS CARVED UP IN TEXAS CHAINSAW.
AMIR: BUT THAT WON'T HAPPEN TO ME BECAUSE YOU WON'T LET IT. I MEAN, YOU KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS STUFF.
BETH: NO. I ACT LIKE I DO. TRYING TO BE ALL COOL AND COLLECTED, LIKE WATCHING THESE MOVIES MEANS I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT, BUT THIS IS REAL LIFE. AND THE TRUTH IS I'M JUST AS LOST AND TERRIFIED AS YOU ARE.
AMIR: HEY. IT'S OKAY.
BETH: JUST BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S COMING NEXT DOESN'T MEAN I'M NOT GONNA FIGHT BACK.
AMIR: YOU GOT AN EXTRA ONE FOR ME?
BETH: KEEP IT. YOU'RE RIGHT. NOWHERE IS SAFE. GHOSTFACE COULD'VE GOT YOU WORKING YOUR SHIFT ALONE.
AMIR: I GOT AHEAD OF HIM ON THAT ONE.
BETH: OR HE COULD BE LYING IN WAIT FOR KYM OUTSIDE MANNY'S PLACE.
AMIR: WHAT ABOUT LIV?
BETH:I MEAN, SHE'S THE NEW GIRL. SHE'S OBSESSED WITH DEION. AND, I MEAN, SHE'S BEEN MIA ANY TIME I'VE SEEN THE KILLER.
AMIR: YOU REALLY THINK LIV'S GHOSTFACE?
BETH: SHE SAID IT WAS ONE OF US, DIDN'T SHE?
AMIR: BUT IF SHE'S THE KILLER, SHE WOULDN'T HURT DEION, RIGHT? SHE SEEMS SO INTO HIM.
BETH: THAT'S WHAT MAKES HIM THE EASIEST TARGET OF ALL. YOU SEE, DEION THINKS HE'S THE HERO OF THIS STORY, SO ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS TUG AT HIS HEARTSTRINGS.TELL HIM SOMEBODY'S IN DANGER, A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS WHO NEEDS HIS HELP. OR SO HE THINKS. SHE'D LULL HIM INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY WITH SOME "WOE IS ME" SOB STORY. THEN SHE'D COMPLIMENT HIM, FEED HIS EGO, MAKE HIM FEEL WANTED. THEN, WHEN HIS GUARD IS DOWN—
AMIR: SHE STABS HIM IN THE HEART.
BETH. NO. WHEN HIS GUARD IS DOWN, SHE...
AMIR: WHAT, JUST LIKE THAT?
BETH: WHY NOT? IT'S JUST SEX. SHE HAS TO GET HIM WHEN HE'S AT HIS MOST VULNERABLE BEFORE SHE CAN GO IN FOR THE KILL. AND YOU WANNA KNOW THE WORST PART ABOUT IT ALL? HE NEVER SEES IT COMING.
BETH: [CRASHING.] [SCREAMING.] THIS IS AWESOME. IT SOUNDS LIKE IT'S FROM A SOUNDTRACK OR SOMETHING.
AMIR: WELL, I SAMPLED SOME AUDIO FROM SOME OF THOSE HORROR MOVIES YOU MENTIONED.
BETH: WAIT, YOU YOU MADE THIS?
AMIR: AND THE FIRST ONE. OTHER STUFF, TOO, BUT, YEAH, THIS ONE WAS JUST FOR YOU. I CALL IT "BETH METAL."
BETH: YOUR STUFF'S REALLY GOOD. DOES EVERYBODY KNOW YOU MAKE MUSIC?
AMIR: NO. I GUESS I WAS AFRAID OF WHAT PEOPLE WOULD THINK. BUT THEN GHOSTFACE SHOWED UP, AND SUDDENLY WHAT PEOPLE THOUGHT OF ME WASN'T SO SCARY ANYMORE. NOT WHEN I COULD DIE AT ANY TIME.
BETH: WELL, THAT WAS ALWAYS TECHNICALLY TRUE.
BETH: ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?
AMIR: COME HERE. JUST RELAX.
BETH: FINE. YOU GOT ME. I CAN'T DANCE. POINT FOR THE NERD.
AMIR: HOW MANY POINTS UNTIL I LEVEL UP?
BETH: HMM. FEELS LIKE YOU ALREADY HAVE. UH, WAIT. MAYBE WE SHOULDN'T DO THIS.
AMIR: I'M SORRY IF I WAS—
BETH: NO. IT'S IT'S NOT THAT. IT'S JUST HAVING SEX WITH A KILLER ON THE LOOSE.
AMIR: WAIT. WE'RE GONNA HAVE SEX? - BETH: YEAH. I MEAN, I JUST DON'T WANNA GET BUSY, AND THEN GET, LIKE, AN ARROW TO THE NECK OR—
AMIR: YOU'LL BE SAFE TONIGHT, I PROMISE.
BETH: I HOPE YOU'RE THIS WEIRD IN BED.
BETH: SOMEBODY TEXTED DEION'S NAME.
AMIR: DID IT SAY WHO IT WAS?
BETH: WHOEVER IT WAS, IT'S PRETTY COWARDLY TO DO IT BEHIND EVERYONE'S BACK LIKE THAT.
AMIR: MAYBE IT WAS JUST SELF-PRESERVATION.
BETH: OH, MY GOD. IT WAS YOU.
BETH: GHOSTFACE.
AMIR: NO ONE IS OUT THERE.
BETH: WHAT? NO. NO, I JUST SAW HIM.
AMIR: TRY TO CALM DOWN.
BETH: AMIR, I'M TELLING YOU WE'RE IN SERIOUS TROUBLE HERE.
KYM: HEY.
BETH: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
KYM: COPS TALK TO YOU ABOUT AMIR?
BETH: YEAH, ONLY ALL NIGHT.
KYM: IF YOU WANNA TALK ABOUT IT, I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH.
BETH: THEN PLEASE, TELL ME, WHAT WHAT AM I GOING THROUGH?
KYM: GRIEF, PAIN. YOU LOST YOUR DUDE JUST LIKE I LOST MANNY.
BETH: YOU AND MANNY WERE BEST FRIENDS. I DIDN'T I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW AMIR.
KYM: EITHER WAY, BETH, KILLER TOOK A LOT FROM US BOTH. SPEAKING OF I'VE BEEN THINKING A LOT ABOUT WHAT DEION SAID LAST NIGHT ABOUT LIV.
BETH: ABOUT HOW SHE'S GHOSTFACE? - KYM: MM-HMM. AND I WAS ALSO THINKING THAT MAYBE WE SHOULD FIND OUT FOR SURE. INVESTIGATE HER TOGETHER.
BETH: TEAM UP? RIGHT, THAT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA.
KYM: GIRL, WE RIGGS AND MURTAUGH.
BETH: WHAT?
KYM: WE JUST LEFT THE WORLD OF HORROR — GOOD RIDDANCE, BY THE WAY — AND NOW WE BUDDY COPS. TWO POLICE OFFICERS, DIFFERENT CULTURES, DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES, FORCED TO BE PARTNERS.
BETH: SO NOT MY GENRE.
KYM: BUT IT'S MINE, THOUGH, OKAY? 48 HRS, RUSH HOUR, LETHAL WEAPON, TURNER & HOOCH. WELL, THAT LAST ONE'S ABOUT A WHITE GUY AND A DOG, BUT YOU GET THE POINT. LOOK, I KNOW WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE CURLED UP IN A CORNER CRYING SOMEWHERE, BUT I'VE DONE ENOUGH OF THAT. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I COULD REALLY USE SOME COMPANY WHILE I TRY TO FIGURE OUT WHO KILLED MY FRIENDS OUR FRIENDS.
BETH: ONE CONDITION. AM I CHRIS TUCKER OR JACKIE CHAN?
KYM: BITCH, I'M BOTH.
BETH: SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN PARTNER. [IMITATES GUNSHOT.
LIV: IF HE DIES, BLOOD WILL BE ON BOTH OUR HANDS, SO CALL ME BACK, OR BETTER YET, SHOW UP.
KYM: DAMN.
BETH: YEAH. THAT WAS HARSH, EVEN FOR ME.
LIV: YOU GUYS HERE TO MONITOR HOW POLITE I AM ON THE PHONE? WHAT DO YOU WANT?
BETH: TO KNOW WHO YOU WERE TALKING TO, FOR STARTERS.
KYM: YEAH, ON THAT PHONE.
LIV: OH, I SEE WHAT THIS IS. YOU CAME TO INTERROGATE ME.
KYM: LET'S JUST CUT TO THE CHASE. WHY YOU ALWAYS MIA WHEN PEOPLE WIND UP DEAD, LIV?
BETH: YEAH. MANNY, AMIR?
LIV: MY DAD IS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE, AND YOU TWO HAVE THE NERVE TO BRING THIS HERE, NOW?
KYM: LOOK, ALL WE WANT IS SOME ANSWERS.
BETH: IF YOU'RE NOT THE KILLER—
LIV: “IF”? ALL RIGHT, SCREW BOTH OF YOU GUYS AND YOUR QUESTIONS. THINK WHATEVER YOU WANT. I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.
BETH: WELL, THAT WENT WELL.
KYM: WE JUST CAME AT IT WRONG, IS ALL. AND WHEN AN INVESTIGATION HITS A SNAG IN A DETECTIVE MOVIE, BOOM! IT'S TIME FOR A LITTLE GOOD COP, BAD COP.
BETH: YOU MUST BE OUT OF YOUR MIND. NO, I AM NOT STAYING HERE.
KYM: YOU GOTTA. I NEED TO FIND DEION, AND HE'S NOT PICKING UP HIS PHONE.
BETH: SO, YOU'RE JUST GONNA LEAVE ME ALONE HERE WITH A SERIAL KILLER?
KYM: THAT'S THE THING. I'M NOT SO SURE LIV'S THE KILLER ANYMORE.
BETH: WHY THE HELL NOT? SOME SOB STORY ABOUT HER PARENTS' DIVORCE AND DEION USING HER FOR SEX? NOWADAYS, WE CALL THAT SOPHOMORE YEAR.
KYM: CALL IT A GUT FEELING.
BETH: YOU'RE TAKING THIS GOOD-COP THING WAY TOO FAR, BECAUSE MY GUT FEELING SAYS LIV IS STILL OUR PRIME SUSPECT.
KYM: THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE THE BAD COP AND EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULD STAY HERE. KEEP AN EYE ON HER.
BETH: I THOUGHT WE WERE IN THIS TOGETHER.
KYM: YEAH. BUT THIS IS THE PART OF THE MOVIE WHERE THE PARTNERS SPLIT UP JUST FOR A FEW SCENES, THEN COME BACK TOGETHER TO SOLVE THE CASE. YOU DIDN'T SEE HOW BAD IT'S HITTING HER. SHE'S A MESS. AND IF SHE'S NOT THE KILLER, WE NEED TO BE STICKING TOGETHER. TRYING TO TALK SOME SENSE INTO DEION MIGHT ACTUALLY HELP, SO HAVE A HEART, BETH. I KNOW YOU HAVE ONE IN THERE.
BETH: GOD. I CAN'T STAND THIS FAMILY-BOY-SEX DRAMA. I'M SO NOT EQUIPPED.
BETH: YOU OKAY?
LIV: OBVIOUSLY.
BETH: YOU WANT TO I DON'T KNOW TALK ABOUT IT, OR?
LIV: WHAT, WITH YOU? YOU WOULDN'T EVEN BE HERE IF YOU DIDN'T THINK I WAS GHOSTFACE.
BETH: TECHNICALLY TRUE, BUT—
LIV: YOU KNOW WHAT? JUST LEAVE ME ALONE.
BETH: [AWKWARDLY.] I'M HERE FOR YOU.
BETH: DEION.
DEION: HEY, HEY. WHERE'S LIV?
BETH: I DON'T KNOW. SHE JUST HAD, LIKE, A MAJOR HISSY FIT AND BAILED.
DEION: KYM SAID SHE WAS WITH YOU, AND SHE'S NOT ANSWERING NONE OF MY CALLS.
BETH: YEAH, I DON'T BLAME HER. YOU PUMPED AND DUMPED, DUDE. WHAT'S GOING ON?
DEION: FIND HER, PLEASE. BUT YOU GUYS GOTTA GET OUT, OKAY? MY BROTHER JAY'S THE KILLER AND HE'S COMING FOR HER RIGHT NOW!
BETH: TWIST.
BETH: THERE YOU ARE. I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU MY WHOLE LIFE. THE MACHINE SPIT OUT TWO.
LIV: I'M NOT EVEN PISSED YOU GUYS WOULD THINK IT WAS ME. I MEAN, IT JUST HURTS THAT DEION WAS THINKING IT, TOO. HE DIDN'T EVEN GIVE ME A CHANCE TO EXPLAIN MYSELF THE WAY YOU AND KYM DID.
BETH: WELCOME TO DATING DUDES 2018.
LIV: AFTER WE HOOKED UP, I THOUGHT WE WERE CLOSER THAN THAT.
BETH: ME AND AMIR BANGED LAST NIGHT. I DON'T KNOW IF IT BROUGHT US CLOSER TOGETHER, IF IT EVEN MEANT ANYTHING OR WHATEVER, BUT I DO KNOW I WAS REALLY ROOTING FOR THAT KID. I WISH IT DIDN'T END LIKE THAT.
LIV: YEAH. ENDINGS ARE ROUGH.
BETH: THEN MAYBE DON'T LET THIS BE THE END OF YOU AND DEION.
LIV: HEY, YOU WANNA GET STARBUCKS OR SOMETHING?
BETH: YEAH, HARD PASS. LOOK, YOU'RE NOT AS LAME AS I THOUGHT YOU WERE, BUT WE CAN'T BE FRIENDS OR ANYTHING.
LIV: UH, OKAY. WHY NOT?
BETH: BECAUSE FRIENDS ARE BLIND SPOTS. YOU LET SOMEBODY GET TOO CLOSE, YOU START TO MISS THINGS. JUST LOOK AT DEION AND JAY.
LIV: WHAT ABOUT DEION AND JAY? BETH: WHEN YOU GHOSTED, DEION CALLED ME. JAY'S THE KILLER.
KYM: I GOTTA END THIS.
BETH: OKAY, NAME ONE HORROR MOVIE THAT ENDS WITH THE KIDS GOING TO THE COPS AND THE COPS CATCHING THE KILLER.
KYM: YOU AIN'T BEEN LISTENING, BETH. WE'RE NOT IN A HORROR MOVIE RIGHT NOW. THIS IS A DETECTIVE STORY, AND WE JUST CRACKED THE CASE.
BETH: WHAT IF DEION'S WRONG?
KYM: OKAY, LET'S REVIEW THE EVIDENCE. DEION SAID HE SAW A MASK IN JAY'S CAR EARLIER, THEN DEION CALLED YOU AND SAID THAT JAY WAS ON HIS WAY TO THE HOSPITAL. NOW WE AT THE HOSPITAL AND GHOSTFACE IS OVER HERE ATTACKING FOOLS. WHAT MORE PROOF DO YOU NEED?
BETH: STILL, GOING TO THE COPS SEEMS SO DRASTIC.
KYM: WELL, DRASTIC TIMES CALLS FOR BITCHES TO GROW A PAIR.
BETH: YEAH, BUT, KYM, SNITCHES DIE, REMEMBER?
KYM: EVERYBODY'S DYING ALREADY.
BETH: OKAY, FINE. GO AHEAD.
KYM: NO. I NEED A WHITE GIRL NEXT TO ME. ADDS CREDIBILITY. EXCUSE ME, OFFICERS. I'M COMPLETELY UNARMED.
BETH: WE KNOW WHO'S BEHIND THAT MASK. HIS NAME IS JAY ELLIOT.
JAY: HELLO?
BETH : HELLO, JAY.
JAY: NEW PHONE. WHO'S THIS?
BETH: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO IT IS. YOU MADE A BIG MESS TONIGHT. MAYBE I CAN HELP YOU CLEAN IT UP.
JAY: MAN, WHY YOU PLAYING?
BETH: YOU'VE TAKEN SOME UNDESERVED CREDIT. I CAN'T HAVE THAT. CHARADE COMES TO AN END TONIGHT.
KYM: LONG AS I'VE KNOWN THAT BOY HIS DREAM HAS BEEN TO PLAY COLLEGE BALL. IT'D BE A SHAME TO SEE HIM THROW IT ALL AWAY WHEN IT'S SO CLOSE.
BETH: THAT'S THE PROBLEM WITH DREAMS, THEY'RE FLEETING.
KYM: USED TO BE YOU'D ASK ME WHAT MY DREAM WAS, I'D SAY IS TO HELP PEOPLE. BUT WITH EVERYTHING WE'RE GOING THROUGH, THE ONLY THING I WANT IS TO LIVE.
BETH: LET'S FACE IT, KYM, ME AND YOU, WE'RE NOT FINAL GIRLS.
KYM: THE HELL IS A FINAL GIRL?
BETH: THE GIRL IN ALL THOSE SLASHER MOVIES YOU'VE BEEN WATCHING FOR RESEARCH THAT MAKES IT TO THE END, SURVIVES, SAVES HER FRIENDS. YOU SAVE ANYBODY LATELY? YEAH, ME EITHER.
KYM: THEN WE'LL SAVE OURSELVES. WE'LL STICK TOGETHER AND WATCH EACH OTHER'S BACKS TONIGHT. WE'RE GOING TO DEION'S GAME. STADIUM FULL OF PEOPLE, COPS ALL UP IN IT. JAY'D BE A FOOL TO SHOW HIS FACE.
BETH: IT'S NOT HIS FACE THAT I'M SCARED OF. IT'S THAT MASK.
KYM: WHAT'S UP WITH THIS LINE? IT'S LIKE THE NEW YEEZYS DROPPING.
BETH: WE'RE THE ONES WHO PUT THE COPS ON HIGH ALERT, REMEMBER?
KYM: WHILE WE WAIT, SOMETHING YOU SAID EARLIER HAS BEEN BOTHERING ME. WHY DON'T YOU THINK EITHER OF US HAS WHAT IT TAKES TO BE THE LAST WOMAN STANDING?
BETH: IT'S FINAL GIRL.
KYM: TO YOU, BUT PERSONALLY, I FIND THAT LABEL SEXIST AND REGRESSIVE.
BETH: WHATEVER YOU WANNA CALL HER, IN HORROR, SHE'S SHE'S EVERYTHING. THE FINAL GIRL IS THE MORAL COMPASS OF THE FILM. AND NO MATTER HOW PROGRESSIVE HORROR GETS, THE FINAL GIRL STEREOTYPE IS ALMOST AS HARD TO KILL OFF AS THE ACTUAL KILLER. AND I TOTALLY RESPECT THAT ABOUT HER.
KYM: IT'S BECAUSE THE KILLER DIDN'T TAKE HER SERIOUSLY. HE UNDERESTIMATES HER.
BETH: EVERY TIME.
BETH: HOLY CRAP. JAY'S NOT THE KILLER.
BETH: UGH. GOD, THIS IS WHAT HAVING FRIENDS IS LIKE, ISN'T IT?
BETH: OH! JUMP SCARE? REALLY? WHERE'S DEION?
LIV: HE JUST WENT AFTER JAY.
BETH: AND YOU LET HIM GO ALONE?
LIV: I NEEDED TO FIND YOU.
BETH: ME? WHAT FOR?
LIV: YOU GOT ANOTHER MESSAGE.
BETH: AND LET ME GUESS. A SNOOP LIKE YOU ALREADY KNOWS WHAT IT SAYS.
LIV: GHOSTFACE WANTS US TO GO TO THE HIGH SCHOOL.
BETH: COOL. NO WAY IN HELL I'M DOING THAT.
LIV: OR DEION DIES.
LIV: ANY LUCK WITH KYM?
BETH: HER PHONE'S OFF AND I THINK SHE JUST STOLE MY CAR.
LIV: MAYBE SHE'S ALREADY HERE.
BETH: WHAT? YOU THINK KYM'S GHOSTFACE? THAT'S CRAZY, LIV.
LIV: IS IT? KYM'S KNOWN DEION THE LONGEST, RIGHT? KNEW HIS HISTORY, KNEW MARCUS. IF GHOSTFACE HAS A PROBLEM WITH HYPOCRITES, KYM'S THE MOST SANCTIMONIOUS OF US ALL.
BETH: I DID SEE HER AND MANNY GET INTO A HUGE FIGHT, BUT I NEVER THOUGHT ANYTHING OF IT 'CAUSE THEY WERE ALWAYS BICKERING ANYWAY.
LIV: MAYBE THE KILLER DIDN'T WANT YOU TO THINK ABOUT IT. WHOEVER THIS IS HAS EVADED DETECTION AT EVERY TURN. KIND OF LIKE KYM HAS SOMEHOW AVOIDED ANY OUNCE OF SUSPICION.
BETH: HUH. I NEVER WOULD HAVE PEGGED KYM FOR THE NORMAN BATES TYPE.
LIV: YOU NEVER KNOW WHO SOMEONE REALLY IS ON THE INSIDE. I ALSO DON'T KNOW WHY GHOSTFACE BROUGHT US HERE IF WE CAN'T GET IN.
BETH: CLASSIC ORIGIN STORY. IT ENDS WHERE IT ALL BEGAN. KIND OF CLICHÉ, BUT THIS PLACE IS TOTALLY OUR CRYSTAL LAKE.
BETH: NO SIGN OF THE KILLER.
LIV: YET. I DOUBT THAT WINDOW WAS LEFT OPEN BY ACCIDENT.
BETH: NO OFFENSE, BUT I DON'T THINK PATRIOTISM IS GONNA STOP GHOSTFACE.
LIV: YOU'RE THE HORROR ENCYCLOPEDIA. HOW'S THE KILLER GONNA FINISH US OFF?
BETH: HARD TO SAY. TOMMY JENKINS AND THAT KID FROM KYM'S BLOCK GOT THEIR THROATS CUT, AVERY CRATERED, SHANE OD'D, AND MANNY GOT TURNED INTO A HUMAN TOSTADA.
LIV: YOU'RE FORGETTING ABOUT AMIR.
BETH: I'LL NEVER FORGET AMIR.
LIV: SORRY, BETH. I'M JUST TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS.
BETH: I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW ME TELLING YOU THAT THE ONE PERSON WHO EVER LIKED ME FOR WHO I AM GOT RUN THROUGH WITH A BONE SAW IS GONNA HELP.
LIV: WELL, IT DOES. THANKS, BETH.
BETH: WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?
LIV: IT'S JUST MY DAD. KEEPING TABS ON ME, EVEN FROM HIS HOSPITAL BED.
BETH: TTYL, DAD. ABOUT TO GET ATTACKED BY A SERIAL KILLER.
DEION: WHAT HAPPENED? IS THAT BLOOD?
LIV: DON'T WORRY. IT'S NOT MINE.
DEION: THEN WHOSE IS IT?
BETH: MINE. YOUR PSYCHO GIRLFRIEND BRAINED ME WHILE MY BACK WAS TURNED.
LIV: BECAUSE SHE'S THE OTHER GHOSTFACE. PLEASE, DEION, YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME.
DEION: I WANT TO. THAT'S THE PROBLEM. SO LET'S JUST TALK ABOUT THIS, ALL RIGHT? LIV: BETH KNEW AMIR WAS STABBED WITH A BONE SAW. HOW ELSE COULD SHE HAVE KNOWN THAT IF SHE WASN'T THERE, IF SHE WASN'T THE ONE WHO DID IT?
BETH: I WAS THERE, YOU BITCH. AMIR DIED IN MY HOUSE. AND AFTER DEION GOT HAULED OFF BY THE COPS BECAUSE OF YOU, I HAD TO SIT THERE ALL NIGHT LISTENING TO EVERY GRISLY DETAIL ABOUT HOW THE ONE PERSON WHO CARED ABOUT ME GOT MURDERED, DETAILS YOU SHOULDN'T KNOW.
LIV: I READ THE POLICE REPORT, OKAY? IT'S A PERFECTLY LOGICAL EXPLANATION.
BETH: YEAH, WELL, SO IS MINE. GUESS THAT PUTS THE BALL IN YOUR COURT, SPORT.
DEION: HOW ABOUT WE JUST CALL THE COPS, ALL RIGHT? LET THEM GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS.
BETH: [GUNSHOT.] I CAN'T LET YOU DO THAT, DEION. OR SHOULD I SAY MARCUS?
DEION: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US?
BETH: YOU MEAN BESIDES EXPOSING YOU ALL AS TOTAL HYPOCRITES? YOU'RE RIGHT. THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU, D'MARCUS. IT'S ABOUT HER. IT'S LIKE I SAID FROM DAY ONE. YOU ARE THE FINAL GIRL.
LIV: STAY AWAY FROM US.
BETH: UM, THIS IS A GUN, YOU IDIOT. JAY'S GUN, TO BE SPECIFIC. LUCKY I GOT TO IT BEFORE THE COPS DID. DROP THAT THING BEFORE I PUT ANOTHER BULLET IN HIS HEAD.
DEION: LIV, RUN.
BETH: SOLID ADVICE FROM YOUR SOON-TO-BE-EX-BOYFRIEND. A HORROR FLICK SHOULD NEVER END WITHOUT AN EPIC CHASE.
LIV: [RUNS.]
BETH: THAT'S THE SPIRIT.
BETH: GOD.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HARD IT IS TO SEE IN THIS DAMN THING. OH, THIS IS GONNA BE FUN.
LIV: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? BETH: BECAUSE I WAS BORN BAD. UNLIKE YOU AND YOUR LITTLE DEADFAST BESTIES, I DON'T LIE TO MYSELF ABOUT IT.
LIV: THEN WHY HAVE YOU BEEN WEARING A MASK?
BETH: THE DIFFERENCE IS WHEN I TAKE MINE OFF, NOTHING CHANGES. I ALWAYS KNEW I WAS A SOCIOPATH. I MEAN, WHY DO YOU THINK I LOVE HORROR MOVIES SO MUCH? I WATCHED EVERY SINGLE ONE I COULD GET MY HANDS ON UNTIL I REALIZED IT JUST WASN'T QUITE ENOUGH. WHY SHOULD MICHAEL MYERS GET TO HAVE ALL THE FUN WHEN I COULD BE A BETTER MONSTER? BECAUSE I'M NOT JUST SOME ACTOR BEHIND A MASK. THIS IS WHO I REALLY AM ON THE INSIDE. COME ON. THAT WAS A KILLER MONOLOGUE. LITERALLY.
BETH: NO WONDER JASON NEVER RUNS AFTER ALL THOSE STUPID COUNSELORS. THIS IS FREAKING EXHAUSTING.
LIV: YOU CAN STOP THIS. JAY'S DEAD.
BETH: NOT WHEN I'M SO CLOSE TO FINISHING WHAT I STARTED.
LIV: THIS WAS YOUR IDEA?
BETH: LIKE I SAID, ALWAYS KNEW I WAS A SOCIOPATH. I WAS A WANNABE KILLER IN SEARCH OF AN ORIGIN STORY UNTIL ONE NIGHT, IT WALKED RIGHT THROUGH MY DOOR. THE MOMENT JAY SAT IN MY CHAIR, I COULD JUST TELL WE WERE KINDRED SPIRITS. HE ASKED ME TO DO HIS DEMONS JUSTICE. AND SO, EVERY TIME HE'D COME IN, MY NEEDLE WOULD GO DEEPER AND SO WOULD HIS DARKNESS. TILL ONE NIGHT, HE TELLS ME ABOUT DEION AND ABOUT HOW MUCH HE HATED DEION FOR ABANDONING THE REAL ONE AND STEALING HIS IDENTITY. ABOUT THE LIE DEION HAD BEEN LIVING EVER SINCE. JAY WANTED REVENGE, AND I REALIZED THIS WAS FATE. I MEAN, IT WAS PERFECT. EVEN THE MASK WAS PERFECT. ALL I HAD TO DO WAS GIVE JAY THE TINIEST LITTLE PUSH. MANIPULATE HIM INTO COMMITTING MURDER, AND IT WAS ON. GETTING DETENTION WITH YOU GUYS, THAT WAS JUST THE ICING ON THE CAKE BECAUSE I GOT TO EXORCISE MY DEMONS, TOO. AND THEN WHEN I HAD TO COVER MY ASS AROUND YOU DEADFAST LOSERS, JAY WOULD WEAR THE COSTUME. BUT BESIDES THAT, I GOT TO BE WHAT I WAS BORN TO BE. AND THAT MOMENT WITH AMIR? GOD, IT WAS EVERYTHING.
LIV: HE TRUSTED YOU.
BETH: HE BROKE THE RULES. AND I KNEW THAT IF I KILLED HIM, I COULD KILL ANYBODY. I MEAN, I MIGHT HAVE EVEN CARED ABOUT HIM. THAT'S WHY I LET HIM SEE ME FOR WHO I'M TRULY WAS.
LIV: A COLD-BLOODED MURDERER?
BETH: HEY, I WARNED AMIR TO STAY AWAY FROM ME. SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T WANNA BE HELPED.
LIV: WERE YOU HELPING JAY, TOO?
BETH: KILLING JAY WAS ALWAYS PART OF THE PLAN. BUT, YOU KNOW, KYM JUST FORCED MY HAND BY GOING TO THE COPS, AND I KNEW THAT IF THEY GOT TO HIM BEFORE I DID, I'D BE SCREWED, SO I HAD TO PUT HIM DOWN. I MEAN, WHAT? I HAD TO PIN ALL THESE MURDERS ON SOMEBODY, RIGHT?
LIV: THEY'LL NEVER BELIEVE YOU.
BETH: UM, RIGHT. WHO DO YOU THINK THE COPS ARE GONNA BELIEVE? A TATTED-UP THUG LIKE JAY OR A PRETTY LITTLE WHITE GIRL LIKE ME?
LIV: I'LL TELL THEM THE TRUTH.
BETH: YOU'LL BE DEAD.
LIV: YOU'RE FORGETTING ABOUT KYM.
BETH: TRUST ME, I'M NOT. I ACTUALLY THINK SHE'S KIND OF COOL, BUT -AT THE END OF THE DAY, SHE'S ALL TALK. DID YOU KNOW THAT I CALLED HER AND I GAVE HER A CHANCE TO GET OUT? AND SHE ABANDONED YOU GUYS WITHOUT THINKING TWICE. KYM MIGHT BE THE BIGGEST HYPOCRITE OF THEM ALL. BUT SCREW EVERYBODY ELSE. THIS IS ABOUT ME AND YOU.
LIV: WAIT, WAIT! IF I'M YOUR FINAL GIRL, THAT MEANS I SURVIVE, RIGHT?
BETH: SEE, I USED TO THINK THAT. BUT THEN I REALIZED HORROR ISN'T ABOUT THE VICTIMS. I MEAN, WHY DO YOU THINK THE FRANCHISES LAST SO LONG? THE BODY DROPS CHANGE, BUT THE KILLER ALWAYS COMES BACK FOR MORE. THE KILLER'S THE REAL HERO OF THE STORY.
LIV: BETH, PLEASE.
BETH: WHAT? FORGET YOUR LINE? DON'T WORRY, THIS IS THE PART WHERE YOU SCREAM.
KYM: STAND BACK, Y'ALL. I’M ABOUT TO PUT A BULLET IN BETH'S JACKED-UP BRAINPAN.
LIV: SHE SAID YOU BAILED ON US.
KYM: DEFINITELY COULD'VE. GHOSTFACE OFFERED ME THE CHANCE TO GET OUT. AND THAT'S WHEN I PUT IT ALL TOGETHER. BETH WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO KNEW I WAS SHOOK ENOUGH TO BOUNCE. BUT THAT AIN'T HOW A FINAL GIRL ROLLS. I CAME BACK FOR Y'ALL INSTEAD. I HEARD THAT FIRE ALARM GOING OFF, AND I FOUND THIS ON THE GROUND. I KNEW THERE WAS SOME REALNESS GOING DOWN.
DEION: OKAY, WELL, THERE AIN'T NO NEED FOR IT NO MORE. YOU CAN DROP THAT THING.
KYM: NUH-UH. IT DON'T MATTER IF IT'S A CLASSIC HORROR, A PREQUEL, A SEQUEL, A PRE-BOOT, OR A REBOOT, EVERYBODY KNOWS THE KILLER COMES BACK FOR ONE LAST SCARE.
BETH: [SCREAMS.] IT WAS YOU THE WHOLE TIME. GUESS YOU'RE RIGHT. WE ARE PARTNERS.
KYM: BOOM. FINAL GIRL, Y'ALL.
